u/-Togo-

Bombed my HPCA final, so going to make a C with a ~78% (pending grade confirmation once this Canvas ransomware issue is done with.) I'm aware that I can make this a "free elective" and have it count towards my degree, which is good news. I'll be covering the Core courses requirement with AOS / CN (and, of course, GA later on), as I intended to take those regardless.

In general, feeling down. I made an A in GIOS last semester, and this was my 4th course in the program. I had some personal issues going on this semester and, in general, didn't feel passionate about the hardware deep-dive of the course. Still, I got good info out of it that is helpful knowledge for how caches and processors work.

Feeling down because my 4.0 is now a 3.5, and I'm potentially going to lose employer funding (validating that with my employer) as their guidelines seem to state maintaining a 3.0 per semester. It's also a hit to the confidence, since I would like to take HPC and AOS while in this program, but if I couldn't get at least a B in HPCA... I don't feel confident in succeeding anymore.

Has anyone else made a C and recovered fine? Would love some encouragement, but constructive criticism is fine too.

I'm struggling.

My first relationship ended (have posted here about it before) a few months ago. The summary is that he was an alcoholic and didn't want to fix it, we broke up for it, I got back in contact with him because I had hope I could change him, but then I "snapped out of it" seeing he wasn't going to (nor was it fair of me to force it on him), so I chose not to reconcile. He was hurt from the whiplash of reopening & reclosing contact and despises me now. We're no contact and truly broken up now.

I'm balancing learning to forgive myself for the hurt I caused him with the pain of an ended relationship and the loneliness that brings.

Some days are better than others, but over the past couple weeks the "lows" have been louder. I'm trying to get involved in community events, spend time with family, be more outgoing at work with people, go to the gym more often... All of this while my brain screams at me for being an awful person and feeling lonely any way.

For those who have been in a similar situation -- how did you forgive yourself for hurting someone you cared about?

For those who have gone through a breakup, period -- what has helped you cope and move on? I'm finding that "keeping myself busy" can only distract me for so long... Does it just "get easier" over many months? I miss him.

Thank you in advance for your advice -- I really do appreciate it.