r/newzealand

Kia ora r/newzealand

Today we acknowledge the Australian magpie. A bird that was introduced to New Zealand in the 1860s by acclimatisation societies who, as this schedule has now documented across multiple entries, were working with genuine enthusiasm and a consistent failure to think things through. The magpie was brought here to control agricultural pests. It arrived, and decided that controlling agricultural pests was only one of many things it should be doing. The others being holding territory, remembering faces and making the cycling community regret its life choices every spring.

The magpie is large, striking, boldly patterned in black and white. It moves through its territory with the unhurried confidence of something that has assessed and categorised every other living thing in its territory. You have been assessed, you have been assigned a category. You will find out what category you are in when you ride your bike in September and this will be delivered without warning.

Some facts about the magpie.

• The Australian magpie is one of the most cognitively sophisticated birds on the planet. It has passed the mirror self recognition test and is only of only a handful of animals capable of recognising their own reflection. A capacity that was previously considered a marker of higher order consciousness. The magpie checked itself out in a mirror, understood it was looking at itself and then went back to swooping joggers. Its intelligence is applied selectively.
• Magpies recognise individual human faces and remember them across years. They distinguish between people who have threatened them and people who have not, responding differently to each. Studies have shown they can identify a specific individual from a group and respond to that individual's approach even when surrounded by strangers.
• They live in social groups with complex hierarchies. A dominant pair, subordinate adults, and juveniles and they all defend territory collectively. Multiple birds will respond to a perceived threat, coordinating their defence with a sophistication that suggests communication, planning and a shared understanding of the territory's boundaries that is more precise than most body corporates manage with an actual map.
• The magpie's song, the carolling, liquid rolling call that carries across the neighbourhood on a still morning is, by most assessments, one of the most beautiful bird calls in the New Zealand soundscape. It is complex, improvisational and varies between individuals and regions, suggesting the bird is not simply executing a fixed programme but composing in real time.
• Magpies have been documented using tools, playing and engaging in what researchers describe as problem solving behaviour. In one Australian study, magpies fitted with tracking harnesses worked cooperatively to remove each other's harnesses. A behaviour never observed before in birds, requiring recognition of another birds problem, the motivation to help and the physical coordination to act.
• In New Zealand, magpies are classified as a pest species in some regions and are not protected under the Wildlife Act. They predate the eggs and chicks of native birds, including species already under significant pressure. The magpie's intelligence and territorial aggression make it a particularly effective competitor

The magpie's carol at first light on a Monday morning is one of those sounds that stops you before you've decided to stop. Before the week has started, before the emails have loaded, before any of it. That rolling, liquid, completely unbothered song from the power line outside, delivered by a bird that recognised your face last week.

The magpie does not negotiate with Monday, the magpie does not dread Monday, it has assessed Monday, assigned it a category and began singing.

You could try that to reduce the Monday blues. It probably won't work, but the Magpie makes it look simple, so why not give it a try?

While this thread is dedicated to the magpie, please post any bird content below.

Magpie Monday is part of the r/newzealand daily bird content initiative, introduced following the Great Rule Update of 2026.

I post something for sale on FB marketplace. Get like 10 messages from people saying they are really keen, where is pickup? I pick the first one who messaged whose profile doesn't look like a bot: " Pickup in Suburb, does tomorrow afternoon work for you?" Them: "Yeah tomorrow afternoon is good, what's your address" Me: "Address is Number Road, between 2-4 is good for me" Them: Doesn't reply.

Tomorrow afternoon 2-4 comes and goes. Around 3pm send a message: Hey are you still keen? I have other people interested. No reply.

I message the next person: Hey if you are still keen and can pickup this evening it's yours. Next person: Yeah absolutely I'm still keen I can do this evening.

THEN ALSO DOESNT SHOW UP OR REPLY TO MESSAGES.

Then I've been waiting around at home for the whole of the afternoon and evening instead of getting the errands done that I need to do.

Every. FUCKING. Time.

What should I do? Send them all the same message?: I'll be home tomorrow at 2pm. If you are the first person to show up with cash it's yours. ???