r/GoodGirlsCommunity

Hello everyone. I am so grateful to have found this community of supportive, like-minded women, and I wanted to introduce myself by sharing a bit about my journey, where I started, where I am today, and the beautiful place I am trying to reach

For most of my adult life, I was the quintessential self-sufficient, independent woman. I was highly capable, constantly problem-solving, and always in charge, result driven, corporate ladder climber. Unfortunately, I brought that "efficiency" energy into my first marriage and maybe due to this and other things it fell apart. Then I remarried and at first I noticed myself doing the same thing but my second husband made it clear in a loving way he was not okay with that. I realized that being the constant manager of my relationship wasn't serving me, wasn't serving him, and was draining our intimacy. I was tired, and I wanted out of the driver's seat.

Today, I am consciously and lovingly transitioning into a submissive, devoted wife. I am actively rewiring my brain to choose yielding over arguing. Because my husband has a background of trauma that makes him a hyper-vigilant people-pleaser, the typical "dominant/submissive" vocabulary scares him. So, I am leading him into his dominance by stepping back and asking him to "take over" to relieve my decision fatigue. It is working beautifully—he is stepping up, leading our household, and feeling like a hero, which is exactly what he is to me.

To help anchor my mind and suppress my old bossy reflexes, I rely heavily on physical submission and my serving fetish, because yes I have that as a kink first and only then started considering re-building my life around submission. A major part of my daily life involves wearing medium-to-large silicone plugs for 8 to 12 hours a day while I do my daily activities. The constant feeling of being stretched and filled serves as a literal reminder of my place: a woman in this position yields; she does not give orders. This way I am trying to use my kinks to build a healthier lifestyle for me and my family away from the culture of self-sufficient strong women.

I need to mention here that I come from a culture where just being a stay at home mom and not providing equally to you man is frowned upon.

So back to our intimate life - we have completely reshaped our sex life to serve him and align both our libidos. We practice an anal-only dynamic with strict clitoral denial and orgasm limitation for me. By limiting my own orgasms to once a week at the most (and only via anal penetration), I can keep myself in a constant state of sexual hunger and devotion. This takes all performance anxiety off his shoulders, allows him limitless access to the sex he loves, and completely shifts the focus of my body to being an instrument for his pleasure.

My ultimate goal is to reach a default state of complete psychological and physical submission. I want him to dominate me entirely, and I want to serve his commands with absolute joy and zero hesitation.

I’ve put down a list of values for my journey to keep me going when in doubt

Peace Over Being "Right": I value the calm of following his lead infinitely more than the hollow victory of doing a task my way.

Building My Husband: I believe that my willing submission is the safe space where his masculine confidence and leadership can finally thrive.

Service as Love: Serving him physically and intimately is not a chore; it is my deepest fetish, my biggest relief, and my purest expression of love.

Continuous Self-Discipline: I am committed to the daily practice of biting my tongue, dropping my posture, and choosing to be a "good girl" even when the old, independent habits flare up.

Hello ❤️
Curious where some of you might suggest a collar from? He and I are looking for something dainty and while we love it being a collar, we are looking for something that wouldn't be super obvious or inappropriate for me to wear in a day-to-day as I do work a professional job.

Hello everyone!

I’m currently 31 weeks pregnant with our first child, which is amazing, but I’m hitting the point where I’m really slowing down. I left my full time job in the beginning of pregnancy, and until now, have been able to keep up with a cleaning schedule, cooking all our meals, and preparing for the baby. It’s been such a great experience so far and I feel ready for the little one. The nursery is together and I have a freezer full of food for when he gets here, but I can no longer keep up with all the housework and cooking.

My husband is more than understanding. He absolutely pampers me. But I can’t seem to shake the guilt and frustration around not keeping up with the household duties, and the worries about how tired I’ll be once the baby is here. All I can think about is the women who keep working until their baby arrives, and how lucky I am to have a husband who prioritizes me staying home, and yet I’m still so tired.

Does anyone have tips for navigating the mental and physical struggles in the last few weeks of pregnancy and into postpartum? I know these feelings aren’t serving me, my baby, or my husband, but I miss getting things done!

Hey ladies! New to Reddit and new to letting my darker side out to play. Long post so please bare with me😬
From past relationships I suffered A LOT of trauma from being emotionally, physically, and mentally abused. So to keep myself safe, I’ve hidden my inner desires and wants within my protective walls and barricades. That being said, I was made to feel very ashamed of my darker desires, kinks, and wants. Until recently. I reconnected with an old flame whom i always seen as a safe person, great friend, never judging. We recently started dating a little and becoming more open to each other, and I found out he’s very dom and has expressed to me he’d be open to help me become more submissive and allow my wants and desires to let as well.
I’ve always been the submissive type; please my guy in all the ways, make sure he’s well kept with food, clothes, needs, all the things, but over the years from my trauma, I’ve become very, very independent. To the point where some men find me too intimidating. I’ve been very open and incredibly trusting of this man with my past and my kinks with this reclaimed man in my life and he’s been very supportive, nurturing, and willing to help bring me “back to life” as he put it.
Last night, I let him collar me and tie me to his bed while being blindfolded; I did ask to try this. And ladies…this man did not disappoint!👏🏼

Thank you for making it this far…here’s my part where I need some advice. While I loved😈 being tied to this man’s bed, being played with, serving his needs, and being his messy toy…internally I wanted to scream and run; my mind was yelling at me to let my flight mode take over but also it felt sooo good to feed my darkness and let her out!

How can I ease my traumatic responses and enjoy this man, enjoy being his sub and exploring this darker side of mine??

Hello all. I 35f an married to my 37m husband of 5 years. Our relationship is complex due to his mental health issues bipolar and bpd. Throughout our 5 years due to insurance issues he had stints of being off his meds. Both times resulted in affairs. One physical the other sexual in nature but only online/phone. Prior to his indiscretions I knew he was into submissive women. I have been a strong independent black woman my entire life. He has always been a tall strong Croatian. I naturally began to submit to him. Permission for all locations I attended. Checking in before I leave, once I get there. He'd call throughout the evening just to check in. Getting my curfew I would be home by certain times. He knew where I was going who was there what was going on and if he was uncomfortable or unsure it was a no! He was my safe space. He was my best friend. We did everything together. The annoying couple that was always together and always touching each other that was us. But with the second indiscretion being so recent I'm just lost and angry and sad and have abandoned my role. He allowed her to call him Daddy, that was mine. He called her my pet names, they were mine. He called and texted and exchanged videos and pictures in our home, that was mine. Now that everything is out here has been open. I have access to all devices and passwords and information. He is back on his meds and starts therapy this week and sees his psych Dr to get his meds adjusted this week as well. I know that he would never have done this if he were on his meds but I'm still hurt. I want our dynamic I miss it so much but that trust has been broken. How do I get out of my head and rebuild the dynamic we had. My rebellion has him angry and he's also angry at the damage he's done but I'm just great broken and afraid and miss him and us so much. The first time was almost 5 years ago and no issues up until his meds got cut off 6 months ago and he engaged in the inappropriate contact for 2 months. I'm trying to be optimistic but have no one to talk to as no one understands or knew about our dynamic and those that did made it weird because of us being different ethnicities. Any support would be greatly appreciated. I know he's in there and I know we can get back to us it just feels daunting.

If you look at my profile it's alot about sex and even some about sexwork. And I like both.

But not just that. I feel really good when I am with a man that is strong, a man that no he is boss because he is man.

It is so good to know I make him happy. I feels great! Just sitting cuddling. Kissing. Cooking. Sex. Listening. I dont understand or remember all he talks but I listen and love it. And the feeling at home. And safe.

I am so happy to obey a man and do all he wants. When I get love and safety back. It make it all feel good.

But it is nice also to just have sex with a man that I just met. When he use me as a toy. Because it make me so wet.

I'm new to the BDSM space and currently talking to a soft Dom. We’ve talked about a lot of stuff except where we live/ look, and names. This is obviously a red flag on both our ends but I really like talking to him and respects my boundaries. He's been patient with me and is moving at my pace. I want to bring this up to him but I'm not sure how. Can someone help??

I wanna be a sub so bad!!?! The best sub possible. What’s the best advice you can give me? Any resources you could share with me for sub&dom play?

I wanna get my new boyfriend involved, he is so dreamy🤤 and I think he will take me seriously. I need some hints to drop him.

This is so hard! I do badly want to be a good girl for myself and for my husband but my entire life I've been the strong independent woman that doesn't need anyone for shit. And as badly as I want to do and be better is do hard to unlearn these behaviors and not beat myself up and give up when they arise. My husband deserves a gentle docile wife and I deserve to be soft and feminine and not carry the mental or physical weight and responsibilities that I currently do. My husband is the only income as I have a respiratory condition that made it impossible to breathe so he told me to quit my job three years ago this June. I do all cooking, snack preparations, I clean his office and turn on his wax warmer so it can smell nice when he comes home, I lay out his after work relaxing clothes and spray them with cologne. I pull out a fresh pair of socks and underwear for him to change into after his shower and make sure his slides are there for him. Everyday when he comes home I greet him at the door and take his lunchbox from him and give him a hug and have his snack and sweet tea waiting on his desk in his office for him. I schedule all his appointments and take care of prescriptions and household inventory so he doesn't have to. And probably other things I can't think of but I do everything in my power to make it so that when he comes home he doesn't have to worry about anything. My problem? My fuckin mouth and attitude and emotions! When I'm upset it bleeds over. When I'm hurt we need to talk and talk now and you better respond the way I need you to or we're going to keep telling about it which makes him feel attacked and badgered so we argue and ruin a good day. I don't do it intentionally and struggle on a deeper level as I have autism and am hyper verbal and overly expressive. My voice and time increase and fluctuate with my excitement or eagerness which can come across as me being aggressive when I'm not and it seems to get lost in translation. How do I learn to STFU! How do I learn that being heard isn't always worth the conflict. I don't want to stop my voice I want to use it when it matters! But I'm so emotional I feel like it always matters lol. I had talked years ago about the desire for physical discipline. Not out of anger but for him to discipline me for acting out. Spankings for crossing lines or throwing tantrums. He was very receptive but there were several catastrophic losses in our life that year that we never came back to the drawing board over it. I really feel like it would help me but don't know how to bring it up. I think I'm rambling, any words of wisdom would be appreciated!