The parasocial problem in this fandom...
Hey so I wasn't entirely sure what to title this as it is kind of just giving my 2 cents on the situation now because despite the fact that it's been almost 3 months now, nothing has really changed. Not sure how long this post is gonna be cause I'm just writing whatever comes to mind.. I can feel the downvotes coming but here we go.
So firstly, I wouldn't call myself a veteran of the kpop scene by any means, Enhypen is genuinely my entry point into all of this, and I've been here since I-Land. But even from where i'm standing, the response to Heeseung's departure and his upcoming solo debut as Evan has been one of the more exhausting case studies in parasocial entitlement I've ever seen, and I think it's worth talking about?
Let me just say firstly, being sad about the lineup change is valid, grieving the seven member era is valid, hell, even taking time to adjust is valid. But there is a very specific strain of reaction that has gone beyond grief and into something else entirely, and I think this "fandom" (if you can even call it that atp) needs to be honest about what that actually is.
Heeseung wrote a letter. He expressed gratitude for six years. He said he'd continue to support the members. Belift addressed it. And then the remaining members, literally the people who actually know him, who share a genuine relationship with him that no fan can claim to have, asked the fandom to move forward and respect the situation. And still that wasn't enough??? which raises the question of what exactly would be, like pls explain that to me because Heeseung and the members don't owe this fandom a version of events that satisfies everyone. They don't owe continuous explanation, or public displays of accountability, or performances of remorse to people they have never met. They addressed it, with more grace than most would, and at some point the responsibility for moving forward shifts entirely to the fans and imo that's the part that keeps getting avoided.
The "we're doing this for Enhypen" argument also falls apart the moment you look at it directly. if your devotion to this group disappears the moment the actual members ask you to do something you don't want to do, you were never really advocating for them. You were advocating for the outcome you personally wanted and using them as justification.
And the framing that he was "sheltered" while the members took the heat, as if Heeseung hasn't been the target of coordinated harassment campaigns, threats, and fans literally organizing to report him to government institutions to destroy his career. He wasn't watching from a safe distance. He was in the center of it. The fact that some "fans" chose to weaponize this to harass others is not a burden that should fall on the person being harassed. There is no reason to compare, both Enha and Heeseung have going though too much, you cannot call yourself a fan if you're sitting here saying nonsense like "oh Enha is getting more hate" or "Heeseung is getting more hate".
And then there's the character assassination. People declaring he's a coward, that he has no conscience, that they can "see who he truly is" (I think you know what post I'm referring to...) with complete certainty, about someone they have never met and will never meet. This is what parasocial culture looks like when it goes unchecked. It's not always the extreme obsessive behavior that's easy to clock. Sometimes it's quieter. Sometimes it looks like accountability. But underneath it is the belief that emotional investment entitles you to a say in someone's life, and when that person makes a decision that disrupts the dynamic, it gets framed as a moral failing on their part rather than a boundary being crossed on yours. Like sorry to break it to you but Heeseung is not going to personally manage your emotional reaction to a decision he made about his own life.
And what's also telling to me is that these reactions are completely impenetrable to logic?? You genuinely can't reason these "fans" out of a position that wasn't built on reason or logic, It was built on feeling, on the intimacy that fandom creates, which is real ig but was always one sided. The goalposts just keep moving because the actual issue was never really about what he did or didn't say. It's about the disruption of a parasocial bond, and that's a lot harder to admit than just calling him a coward.
Heeseung left one of the biggest fourth gen groups to build something entirely on his own terms. That's bravery and courage, if you ask me. He handled the departure with grace, if I can say that. He's heading into his solo era with a name he's carried since childhood and a sound that actually reflects who he is as an artist. Enhypen is also moving solid as 6 members and trying their genuine best despite everything.
I think the people who can hold space for both the grief of that era ending and the excitement of what's coming are the ones genuinely showing up for him and enha. Everyone else is just upset that a person they never met refused to stay the character they needed him to be.
At this point, I think I covered everything I want to so just as a last note, these people just need to step away from the screen and touch some grass because if a career decision made by someone you have never met has you this personally unraveled to the point where you go as far as sending death threats or just doing a bunch of dehumanizing nonsense towards Heeseung or the members, you just need to get a life, I'm sorry because this is not healthy and it never will be.