The doctor's kid experience. Growing up with a parent who was never home.
My father is a surgeon. Growing up, this is what I remember.
Dinner without him 5 nights a week. He'd come home, eat alone at 10pm, and go to bed. My mother would keep food covered in the kitchen.
Birthday parties where he'd arrive after the cake was cut. Not because he forgot. Because a surgery ran long. He'd walk in with his hospital ID still hanging from his neck.
Family vacations that got cancelled because "ek case aa gaya." My mother would unpack the suitcases without saying a word. She'd done it enough times.
Phone calls during every family function. He'd step out, talk for 15 minutes, and sometimes not come back because the call required him at the hospital.
I resented him for years. Thought he chose medicine over us. It took me becoming a doctor myself to understand. He didn't choose medicine over us. The system didn't give him the option to choose both.
Now I'm the one coming home late. I'm the one missing dinners. I'm the one whose phone rings during family events. I understand my father completely. And it terrifies me because I'm becoming exactly what I resented.
The cycle continues because the system hasn't changed. We don't need more dedicated doctors. We need a system that doesn't demand dedication at the cost of everything else.