3.5 year old won’t stay with babysitter while I work
TLDR; how to support our 3.5 year old to be okay with babysitter?
Our 3.5 year old has always been quite the little barnacle and she still cosleeps and feeds to sleep with me. I support it fully, though it’s tiring sometimes, and clearly has a slow to warm temperament, so I’m letting her lead. Usually she likes to get used to people for a bit and then she’ll warm up quickly, and quicker as she’s getting older (though still a bit unsure of other kids). I work from home four hours a day. I’ve hired a new babysitter (a sweet 17 year old) to play with her while I work upstairs. My spouse comes home sometimes before babysitter arrives or midway.
We’ve had a few babysitters (two didn’t work out, one was stable for about 7 months) and we recently had some major life events (beloved pet died unexpectedly and we moved out of the home and country she’s always known to be near the only actively engaged grandparent she has-she’s very close with him) and I’ll say dad is inconsistent in his involvement and relationally we’re not doing amazing. So I see many reasons why this may be, and I understand she’s developmentally also at an separation anxiety phase, but she did well with the babysitter the first week and now is crying that she doesn’t ant me to go and won’t settle for the babysitter.
Today my spouse just didn’t leave the room at all. I tried having babysitter come earlier and staying for a bit but that made no difference. I try not to linger but now she’s latching onto dad and not wanting him to leave.
Does anyone have ideas how I can support her to be comfortable with the sitter?