Trying to help a friend with addiction.
I'm in the UK, if that's helpful.
My sister-in-law is in an absolute vice-grip with Ketamine addiction. It's probably been a problem for a couple of years, she's struggling to be honest about the timeline, which is understandable. She came forward in October, told her family, and moved in with her parents, who me and my wife also live with for care reasons.
She might have been clean for a few months, but definitely relapsed in a big way about a month ago, and things have declined rapidly since. I offered to go with her to an NA meeting, and she chose one that's about a 60-90 minute drive away, so there's less chance of her seeing someone that she may know/run into at work.
The meeting she's said she'll try is tomorrow morning. I can't drive, so she'd be driving. Unfortunately, she's been high every single night since Sunday afternoon, and I'm pretty sure she'll be high again tonight. I don't feel comfortable getting in a car with her tomorrow, even if she's technically no longer "under the effects". I'm familiar with the drug, and how long it lasts, and what the comedown is like, and it just doesn't feel right to me.
I have no idea what to do, as this is the only meeting she's said she'll go to, and is either too afraid or not afraid enough (if you see what I mean) to get help elsewhere. I feel like if I turn round and say I can't go with her, or even if I suggest we take public transport, it will come across as me shaming her, and just make things worse.
Just to be clear, I'm not here to judge her decisions around what help she's getting and where, or to get advice on what other help is available, these are things I'm well aware of, as is she. I just don't know how to raise this issue in any way that doesn't make her feel like a piece of shit that isn't worth getting better.