Tips on what I did wrong in the academic writing section?
Hey! I did the official ETS mock test recently and got a score of 4 in the academic discussion section. Could somebody help me figure out what was possibly lacking in my response so I may improve in the future, please?
My response:
I agree with Claire's statement. Although Andrew is right about enviromental and social influences, human beings can still make their own judgements and seek after other ways of living and thinking.
Growing up, we are havily influenced by the elements surrounding us: school, parents, siblings, media, etc. However, when we grow up and go out into the world on our own, there is a chance to challenge the pre-established ideas we grew up with and change our ways of living. Jean Paul Sartre argues that although we are situated in a society and it's conditions, there is still freedom to make our own choices. For example, someone can grow up with abusive parents, but make the decision to not let those factors affect the way they engage with others, breaking the cycle of abuse.
In conclusion, free will is real and humans always have a choice and autonomy, even if limited by enviromental factors.