u/opie6373

Hello, so I’ve been dating someone for maybe a month or so. She is divorced a year after 25 years married. We had numerous dinner, movie, walking dates before any physical contact aside from a peck on lips in parking lot after dinner. The last 3 dates have been at our homes. We “kissed” after the first one where it was more closed mouth quick kisses.

The next date I said should we do the awkward first kiss. She thought we had already had the awkward first kiss and last time she thought i wasn’t kissing her back. So we kissed again and held closed mouth kisses longer. I was affectionate and was rubbing her arm and playing with her hair and putting my hand on hers. I tried to use some tongue and she just kept her mouth closed. She didn’t touch me back at all.

Last night was the same thing. No touch back, no open mouth kissing. I have been super patient after maybe 10 dates. I’m not trying to push her into sex but I’ve haven’t kissed like this since before 13 years old. No one I’ve been with or kissed did not open mouth kiss. Also I don’t think I’ve ever been on 10 dates with someone and not had sex. She doesn’t even touch me. I compliment her and tell her she is beautiful and pretty. She rarely responds, she never says anything about liking me or compliments me. The only thing she has said is she likes my glasses. She is Catholic and goes to church semi-regularly. She has asked whether I was talking to anyone else or on dating apps. I told her no which is true which leads me to believe she likes me.

I suspect it’s her nature, religion, upbringing, past trauma from marriage? I am thinking about asking about kissing preferences. It’s just very frustrating and I am affectionate and love intimacy and I just don’t know if she will ever be affectionate, complimentary or will have normal sex. Maybe that was missing from her marriage.

She had many great qualities and I live in a small town with few quality available people so I don’t want to give up on it but I’m concerned. Thoughts?