How did you fully deal with the depth of being diagnosed?
I’ve been diagnosed for almost a year now, my diagnosis going from bipolar 2, to bipolar 1, to now schizoaffective type bipolar.
I guess I just didn’t truly believe that I actually had anything serious. Today though I got a second opinion on my diagnosis, which confirmed all my episodes and my overall diagnosis.
It feels like I was just diagnosed again for the first time, and the gravity that my life’s actually going to be like this forever is starting to kick in for the first time in a while.
I haven’t been consistent with my medication, and I know I need to be. My lifes so much easier when I’m on them, but I then forget how hard life was when I’m off them and get off.
I’m scared I’m going to keep going off them and seriously hurt myself someday. I know people will just say “take them” and talk about how it’s ruined their lives by going off, and I’m not hating, it just doesn’t seem to sink into my head when people say that.
I don’t know what I’m trying to say right now. As of this moment I’m determined to stay consistent with my meds, but I don’t know how long that will last. Has anyone overcome this before without going through hell?
Or am I just going to have to ruin everything and pay the price.