u/nil-vice

I work at a mid-sized tech company, about 50 people, and the place is pretty close-knit where everyone knows each other. After a recent restructuring, I started reporting to a new manager. It's been two months, and my responsibilities are being taken away from me one by one. For the last 4 weeks, my main job has been to get the new manager up to speed on everything I used to do.

They ignore me on Slack, and whenever I ask what my priorities are, the answer is always 'just focus on the handover' and 'we'll have work for you soon.' Last week, I also wasn't invited to a team-building lunch, and they said it was a 'spur-of-the-moment' thing, but everyone from my old team was there. It's very obvious, especially since we didn't hit our quarterly target.

What I really don't understand is why they're dragging this out. Why don't they just fire me and be done with it? Honestly, I can put up with this weird atmosphere for a while as long as I'm still getting my salary. But it makes my days at the office very unpleasant and stressful. My old manager now avoids eye contact and is always 'too busy' to talk to me.

I'm not going to resign and give them what they want. Has anyone been through this before? What would you do in my place?

I still can't process what happened at my desk this morning. My manager thought it would be a hilarious joke to throw some thumbtacks on my chair. I didn't see them and sat down, and suddenly, I felt a sharp prick in my leg. Thankfully, the tacks didn't go in deep, but it hurt like hell and left a few red marks. The weird thing is, I was in a great mood. I had just come back from lunch and won about $900 in an online poker game, and then this idiot does this. He was dying of laughter, telling me to lighten up and that it was just a joke, but I'm not laughing at all.

This wasn't a joke; it felt more like assault, honestly. We're supposed to be professionals here, right? This crossed the line by a mile. Now I'm sitting here trying to decide if I should go to HR, or if that will just get me targeted for not being a 'team player'. Am I crazy, or is this something I should report immediately?

This isn't false modesty or anything, but I've always been great at job interviews. I feel like these days it's less about technical skills and more about 'vibe' and likability, so here are a few things that have worked for me:

I practiced public speaking a lot when I was younger and got good at improvising and thinking on my feet. Get a friend you trust and have them throw random topics at you, and you have to talk about each one for two minutes straight. They don't have to be complex topics, just anything. That's what we do in our normal conversations anyway, and it helps you organize your thoughts and speak clearly under pressure.

Study the company well. You don't need to go too deep unless you're asked for a big report or a take-home assignment. When you reach that stage, you must look at their competitors in detail. But in the first or second calls, things get very hectic when you're interviewing at 6 other places in the same week. So here's the bottom line: spend 45 minutes researching the company the night before. Then, do a quick 10-minute refresh right before the call. That's all you need to seem like you're in control and know everything.

Forget the authority dynamic. I've never been good at dealing with people in positions of power; maybe it's just my personality. The thought that I know my job well is what always calmed me down. I tell myself they need me more than I need them. It's all a business transaction, and they're the ones with the money trying to find someone (me) to give them with a service. If you think of yourself as the one in control, you'll feel much more confident.

Anxiety is normal. I still get nervous ten minutes before any interview because I hate being late. You have to give yourself space to breathe and decompress after each one. Remember, you have the skills they're looking for, which is why they called you in the first place. They already see something good in you. Your job is to show them they were right.

Make them laugh. Seriously. Be relaxed, sit up straight, and don't slouch over your desk, even on a video call. Talk like a normal human being. Even if it's a very formal company, you'll notice the interviewer starting to loosen up with you. Of course, don't be disrespectful to anyone, but be a cool and composed person. Your mission is to make them laugh at least twice. People say to talk about the weather or a new hobby to seem interesting, and that's fine, but the person who genuinely makes them laugh during a long day of boring interviews is the one they'll remember.

You are in control of this conversation. You're the one steering it. Many interviewers are just winging it, and if you sense that, don't be afraid to politely take the reins. You can say something like, '[Interviewer's Name], I just want to be mindful of our time as I have another meeting at [Time]. I'd love to quickly talk about how my background fits this role, hear a bit from you about your vision for the position, and then I have a few questions for you. How does that sound?' This move is golden and works every time.

Now for the content itself. Your entire career history doesn't matter; what matters is how you connect it to this specific job. I use one of two methods: either I tell my story chronologically and then list the 8 key skills I have that align with their job description, or I go through each past job and highlight the specific skills I used that they're looking for. Don't list way more skills than they're asking for; it looks weird, and they might think you're overqualified or arrogant. You also need to have questions prepared - and I mean really prepared, not just thinking of them on the spot. Prepare 3 smart, specific questions that show you've thought things through. Avoid easy questions like 'What's the team like?' or 'What's the company culture?'. They're tired of answering those. If the company is very mission-driven, you could ask the hiring manager what made them join, but that's about it.

When you get rejected, it means there's a better path for you. You can kill it in every interview, at every stage, and still be told no. It's happened to me, and it can destroy your self-confidence. You have to remember that you can do everything right and still not get the outcome you want. It's not a reflection of you; that's just life. You get up, get back on your feet, and keep going. For context, I'm a senior-level professional, and companies have always reached out to me; I've never had to truly 'look' for a job. I left a toxic job last November and was unemployed from December 15th to February 20th. During that time, I sent out about 550 applications, did over 70 interviews, reached the final round at 12 places, and only got 5 offers. It was soul-crushing. But I didn't stop. I decided that the companies that rejected me weren't looking for what I had to offer, and that's their choice. Many companies don't want top performers; they just want people who will follow orders. If they didn't hire you, it's their loss.

I'm happy to help anyone in marketing, ops, comms, or PR with interview prep or any questions.