u/m4nt15mantis

My puppy is 12 weeks old. I’ve had him two weeks. He is having a very hard time with the crate, but I need him to be able to go in there.

Current routine:
Wake around 6, potty, breakfast, walk, hang with me while I get ready, drop the kids to school, then I set him up with two frozen Kong toys w snacks in them in the crate with calming music on, blanket over the crate.
He goes in at 8 and comes out at 11:30. He cries frantically the entire time, but frankly I have to go to work there’s just nothing I can do about that.
I come home for lunch, potty, walk. He is usually pretty chill, but when he comes out of the crate he is still whiny even after a walk and some treats, probably because he gets so worked up.

Then he comes to the office with me from about 12-2. No issue from 12-2 he chills at my feet throughout that time (usually in meetings)
Then I work from home in the afternoon about 2-4. We get the kids from school between 4-5, and have a normal evening with a few short walks and playtime in the backyard. Bedtime is around 10, and he is sleeping with me and my partner simply because I am afraid to have him screaming all night in the crate, despite it being next to the bed I think he will keep my kids awake and they need their sleep. We only really have him in bed because this puppy stuff is a lot and we definitely still need to get our zzzz’s.

When I have him in the yard if I put him on a tie out where he can’t reach me he barks and cries the whole time. I have done this only twice because of how loud and worked up he gets. It sucks because once he is in that state I think I’m not supposed to acknowledge him so I have to wait for a pause in his freak out before I can mark it and then take off the leash or take him out of the crate.

My biggest question is: what’s next? We start puppy school in a few weeks so I’m sure I’ll learn more then. For now, how can I improve the separation? There are a lot of things online suggesting to put them in and out of the crate many times a day to get them used to it. If I could better understand how to schedule this and what to do/not do I will get started. I also am willing to crate train him at night and read that they might stay calm if you sleep next to them in it for a while. I can start that, but what do I do if he keeps crying anyway? There’s a lot of conflicting advice!

Thanks for any help you can provide :)

Hey all - I’m a mom of four (ages 11-20), own my home, work full time at a nonprofit profit nearby (less than a mile) where it is semi dog friendly. I have a flexible schedule now after I have just completed my second bachelors degree before I move into my masters this fall.
Me and my partner have been talking about a dog for a year or so, our 11 year old terrier/shep mix passed a few years ago…
I’m graduating Saturday! We welcomed a new puppy on May 3rd from a local rescue - male mix with mom a husky/shepherd mix and dad a Rottweiler (prob not ‘pure bred’).
He was born 2/22 and is just so stinking cute. Certified good boy behavior MOST of the time. But recently he has gotten really spicy with my 11 year old, and she is really overwhelmed.
To give an idea:
He sleeps in the bed w me and my partner nicely thru the night with one potty break. In the morning he’s up around 6 and we take him out, walk him, feed him, etc. the morning routine happens and he is usually pretty well behaved as we get ready for the day. I have to crate him from about 8-11:30 or 12, which the foster said would be fine because save had him crated all morning, out for 30 mins at lunch, then crated again til she’s home from work.
I have been diligent about his morning routine and have the crate next to my bed, he gets a puzzle toy w frozen yogurt and kibble and a frozen Kong w treats and stuff. He also has a bully stick and a stuffy in there. He goes in quietly and I play calming dog music while he is in my room in the morning while I’m away.
He typically barks, howls and screams a lot. Sometimes it’s half and half or sometimes more ir less. I only take him out when he is quiet, and calmly. Most days he pees in the crate and I have had to give baths when that happens. He comes to work with me 12-2/3 ish and then I bring him back to my house to work from home.
He is usually quiet and well behaved in the office, he gets a chew and usually lays quietly or sleeps under my desk or whatever table where I am working at during meetings. People come and go and he is chilll.
He is chill on walks he doesn’t bark at people walking by. He chills on the porch and in the building while people come and go. He is doing much better with potty training, using the bell to tell us when he has to go. He has also learned his name, sit, down, “right here” by my side or where ever I point, shake, and “up” where he boops my hand. He is highly treat motivated. He walks in a loose leash nicely until he decides he wants to go home the. He tries to pull me. I have been training against that by stopping when he pulls.

In the evenings it has been nothing but puppy world. Constant in and out. Managing him from chasing the cats… mostly when he is crazy he will lock in on them. Chasing results in play bows, nips but none that land while the cat smacks him in the face, and he barks at her. I generally reacts by speaking calmly and petting him saying he needs to be nice to the kitty. When I get into it his energy shifts or sometimes the cat runs past him and I have to step on his leash.

The problem is that he is very nippy with my 11 year old. She loves him. Almost every time she goes to interact with him he puts his mouth on her. It’s not as gentle as he is with me. He jumps up at her a lot. I usually redirect…
Also outside sometimes he will straight up come for me, he kind of dives at me, slightly open mouth, with a bonk and a little nip. At first it was cute but he’s already getting bigger and now I am not seeing a lot of positive interactions with my 11 year old.
I’m big on positive reinforcement and redirection. He drags a leash everywhere he goes. I am treating him while he lays in the crate next to me while I work from home in the afternoons…

Tonight my daughter broke down and said she is so overwhelmed. The amount I have to manage the dog in order to provide positive reinforcement and prevent negative interactions is definitely above what I anticipated. Potting I get, but this bump/nip behavior is a little scary to me having been chased by aggressive dogs in the past.

I feel like we have a good situation set up for a new puppy. But, he screams when he is alone. He tends to follow me room to room.
When he is chill, he is just an angel and we are so in love.

What else can I do? Did I f up my kids life? What could I do to lessen the emotional burden on the kids/family

Crate training 12 week pup

Redirecting nipping and crate training