Dealing with potential burnout in the industry
I guess this is more about me writing it down to not keep it all in my head more than anything but if you have experience with this i'll gladly take your help.
In the last ~12 months I've changed jobs two times out of my own will. I was not forced to, or layed off. I should also add that I do not live in a big tech sector at all but there is good activity here, enough to make a good living.
I left my previous job where I was for 6 years, I had made a decent name for myself in the company and did the corporate ladder thing but felt stuck and wanted new challenges.
I interviewed somewhere where I was referred, still did all the grueling interview process but in the end I got in. I quickly became good in the team and got two rounds of very positive feedback. This job was 100% remote and it was really taking a toll on me.
About 4 month ago I got contacted by someone to join his new company, I knew him professionally and knew he was very smart, incredible engineer much smarter that I could ever be. I would be the first employee.
I took the plunge.
Even though in the interview process he told me it would be chill and mostly 9to5, I've been feeling immense pressure. I'd say i'm working 50-60hours a week if not more. For some of you this may not be a lot but for me it is.
We are working 100% with Claude Code and I haven't written a single line of code since then. It is really affecting me mentally.
Another team member joined shortly after. Both my boss and the other team member have massive experience in the business we are tackling and I do not. I'm feeling fraudulent and especially with AI I feel like I could easily be replaced. Every day I feel the pressure that I'm not fast enough and afraid I could be fired. It would be very humiliating because it is a small city and everyone knows each other.
I'm feeling weird when I'm not working. Others are working on weekends and national holidays. I can't, I have to take care of my young childs, and to be frank I don't really want to be working I prefer living.
Before AI I would have been very confident with my speed and execution, now, not so much.
I find it very hard to have my boss, be also my teammate. I'm never sure If I'm getting it straight or behind my back he's thinking I'm an idiot. With such a small team there is nowhere to hide. When there is a bug everyone in the team knows/sees it. There's no layers or managers to talk to.
So I'm not sure at this point If I try to grind it out to the finish line with this new job or quit of my own. Another option would be to really put limits for myself to 40h/week but we are a startup and I feel like that would just cause me to lose my job. I'm also afraid to ask for feedback, because it is my boss and also the same person paying me. I've never been in this spot and it's very awkward. I know I'm doing mostly well, but no ones telling me. It never has hapenned. I'm also not being told I'm not doing well so it's also that uncertainty thats messing with me.
I'm not even sure If I want to continue in this line of work, although I've been doing it for ~15 years now, I really don't see myself continuing on this path especially with AI sucking all the fun out of it.
I know I'm extremely privileged to even have work in this industry, and the pay is great, but my mental health is taking a toll, even if I reorient I can't know for sure I'd enjoy the job. Although I'm seriously starting to plan/think for an exit into another field.
I also have kids to feed and a roof to pay that's the hardest part I feel like.
I'm certain i'm not the first one to feel this, but with the paradigm shift to AI, it seems to accentuate everything ten fold.
sorry for my lackluster english, i'm sure you will prefer it to an AI written post