Tips/Tricks to a newb + my story.
Hello!
Found this subreddit, while I'm trying to "survive", my panic attack hangover, and wanted to share my story and also ask for help! :)
TL;DR at the bottom.
First of all, I'm 31M and probably in the best shape of my life, but I do care about my health a lot (maybe too much lol).
I'm not officially diagnosed with axiety, but it is strongly suggested, that I have anxiety that causes panic attacks.
I had my first panic attack roughly 6 months ago, while meeting up with my family in a store at an outlet. I got out of the car and my heart suddenly started racing while walking towards the store where my brother and his family were.
When we entered the store, I suddenly got insanely dizzy, and by the time I reached my brother, I was about to pass out. I pulled my dad's jacket and said that something is wrong.
We went outside, my heart still racing like I'd just finished a marathon. My dad told me I was pale like a ghost. So I called the ER, and after a facetime call, they wanted to check me.
They took vitals and an ECG (took 7 hours before the vitals came back lol), and everything looked great, besides the elevated heart rate, that lasted over 6 hours. It was around midnight the doctor released me, after ensuring it wasn't life threatening and he said it was probably an anxiety/panic attack.
I was a little uneasy the next couple of days, I had this strange feeling in my body, like I was drained, weak and fragile. A few days later I was perfectly fine, and I was fine for almost 6 months - until now.
5 days ago, I was sitting at the computer in my office, when suddenly it happened again out of nowhere, but somehow it was different this time, my chest felt compressed, like someone was sitting on my chest.
Calling the ER only to be number 17 in line, when I hit number 11, I almost passed out and had to call an ambulance, since I live alone, and didn't want to pass out alone.
They came, took an ECG, and everything was fine, around 100 in heart rate, and after talking about it, one of them said, "You were pale as a ghost when we arrived, but now you seem to have regained your color".
They wanted me to come with them to the ER, but I insisted I wanted to drive myself, since I was starting to put 2 and 2 together, and this seemed familiar and not lethal. (The ER is a 30 minute drive from me, so I didn't want to be stuck there, not being able to drive home).
Same as first time, vitals and ECG all perfectly fine, except an increased number of white blood cells (that also was the case the first time), but I was told it was perfectly normal, because the body has been under a lot of stress.
But this time, the anxiety didn't disappear. It is Friday night as of writing this, the attack happened Monday night. I've since had 2 mini attacks.
One yesterday while getting a back massage, I suddenly got a sharp sting in my left chest, and then my heart rate exploded, I tried calming myself, told myself it's just a panic attack, it's not dangerous and focused on my breathing. I somehow got through it, but it was hella uncomfortable, because I was lying on my stomach with my head down the donut head rest thingy, and my masseuse going crazy at my back lol.
I felt so bad, because the attack happened again, that didn't happen last time, so I got crazy anxiety.
I slept 2 hours that night, and today, I had to go to my grandmother's funeral. So I felt like shit when I woke up, while getting ready my heart rate went up and down and I felt hollow and uneasy.
When I arrived at the ceremony in the church, I felt the same feeling, insanely uneasy. Then the church bells started ringing and my heart went bat shit, as it was about to jump out of my chest. I calmed down a bit under the ceremony. Had to carry the chest to the car, but that somehow calmed me down a lot, especially when we came outside in the pouring rain.
The rest of the day, I've felt like shit. Heart rate going up and down, every ache or little pain makes my heart rate go crazy and then I feel dizzy and lightheaded.
I've also noticed that I'm really hyper sensitive to sound as of lately, the bells in the church for example, I also saw a reel on Instagram, where someone bit into a cake with a chocolate layer, that crunch sound almost made me jump up and made me feel really uneasy.
TL;DR
It's been 5 days now, and the anxiety is yet to disappear. I feel like shit.
Any recommendations? I've tried breathing deeply trough my nose and exhaling slowly out of my mouth, but that somehow makes it worse. Tried counting, kinda helps, but as soon as I stop, it's back. watching movies helps a bit, but I still get 'ultra mini attacks'.
How do you cope with this? How do you manage it? And have you tried experiencing it for 5 straight days, with mini attacks?
As of writing this, I've calmed down a bit. I took a 15mg Mirtazapine pill before writing this, it might have kicked in. Funny mention: I started taking Mirtazapine before my very first panic attack 6 months ago, but not for anxiety, my doctor prescribed it to help me sleep and feel more rested, because I've been drained the last 5 years, even with 10 or 12 hours of sleep, always tired.
The very first day after I didn't take Mirtazapine, I had my first panic attack ever. I stopped Mirtazapine completely like 4 months ago, but could Mirtazapine maybe be connected to why I started having panic attacks in the first place?
Sorry for the long post lol, hopefully this will help others after me also.
Thanks in advance!