u/cs21-10

Hey everyone,

I (23M) work at a PSU Bank as a banker. Life is pretty stable, and this is my first salary, so I’ve tried to build a simple long-term investment plan after doing some research.

I’m keeping things fairly simple and focused on long-term growth + liquidity for emergencies.

Would really appreciate honest feedback on whether this allocation makes sense or if I should tweak anything.

Thanks in advance!

About a year ago, I started dating for the first time in my life. Before that, I barely had any female interaction because I was busy with studies and banking exam prep. Fast forward to now — I got the government bank job I wanted, but my dating life has genuinely been one of the weirdest experiences ever.

So here’s the short version of my past one year:

Girl #1 — University senior

My first ever “dating” experience. We used to sit in the library, talk at night, awkward vibes from both sides because neither of us really knew what we were doing. Never became romantic. It was basically just my first female interaction.

Girl #2 — Reddit girl

Met her through Reddit. Extremely introverted. I used to carry conversations alone while she silently accepted chocolates like an NPC. Things faded. Months later I saw her dating someone else and genuinely got shocked that she even talked to men voluntarily.

Girl #3 — College mutual

Friends hyped me up saying “bro this one is into you.” Meanwhile another girl I used to go on walks with got jealous, both girls started fighting, hostel drama started, abuses were exchanged, and somehow I lost both connections without even dating either of them properly.

Girl #4 — Exam center girl

Met during banking exams. Same district, instant vibe, things moved fast. She got emotionally attached, then cried after we got close saying “this feels wrong,” disappeared, came back months later emotionally broken, then blocked me because I joked that maybe I should just stick to casual dating.

Girl #5 — Rich Hinge girl

I reached on my Activa. She arrived in a Defender. That should’ve told me enough already. She took me café hopping and shopping like I was her emotional support Labrador. I eventually told her the dynamic felt weird. Got removed from Instagram immediately.

Girl #6 — Same university girl from Hinge

At first felt perfect. Intellectual, mature, same university background. Then eventually I realized she didn’t want love, casual dating, or commitment. She basically wanted an emotional rental boyfriend she could rant to whenever life felt difficult.

Girl #7 — The fairytale one

Probably the closest thing to a movie romance I experienced. Long walks, late-night hugs, soft moments, everything felt unreal. Then she opened up about deep trauma, disappeared right after, ghosted me completely, and left me wondering what the hell had just happened.

Girl #8 — “You sound like my ex” girl

Girls’ college, strict hostel timing, cute Himachali vibes, gifts, UNO cards, breakfast dates, emotional comeback arc — everything was going great until she randomly hit me with:

“I miss my ex… and your voice sounds like him.”

Brother I genuinely had no response left in my system at that point.

Girl #9 — School friend

Old school friend came back into my life through Instagram. Started with memes and stupid humor, somehow escalated into sexting and emotional attachment. Then reality hit — orthodox family, no future, impossible logistics. We’re still mutuals, but now I just watch her close-friends stories in silence like a retired soldier.

Girl #10 — The intellectual 10/10

Beautiful, smart, mature, exactly my type. I finally thought “okay maybe this is it.” Two dates later:

“I still can’t move on from my ex.”

At this point I wasn’t even sad anymore. I was just impressed by the consistency of the universe.

Girl #11 — The final nail in the coffin

Met through Hinge again. Rainy park date, romantic songs, chocolates, movie dates, Chinese food, affection I had genuinely never experienced before. She said “I love you” after one week. I still tried staying logical because my past experiences had already damaged me mentally. Then one day she cancelled plans, blamed me for confronting her about it, and that was it.

And honestly? That’s when something inside me switched off.

The funny part is that I genuinely tried every single time. I was respectful, emotionally available, understanding, patient — I always went in hoping maybe this one would become something meaningful.

But modern dating feels exhausting as a guy.

People want emotional support, validation, attention, affection, late-night talks, intimacy, comfort…

…but very few people actually know what they want.

Now I mostly focus on my bank job, gym, trekking, cooking, hobbies, and friends. Life is stable. Ironically, now that I’m finally financially settled, the excitement for dating itself is almost gone.

And yeah, maybe someday I’ll find someone genuine. Maybe naturally, maybe through arranged marriage.

But if you’ve experienced modern dating recently, you’ll probably understand exactly what I’m trying to say.

Anyway, thanks for reading my TED Talk. Lol.

TL;DR:

Started dating one year ago expecting love, got emotionally unavailable people, ex trauma, ghosting, mixed signals, and character development instead. Got a government bank job in the process, but lost interest in modern dating completely. LOL

Hi everyone

I recently joined a PSU/government bank and just got my first salary. My in-hand is around ₹44K after tax and NPS deductions (around ₹3K/month goes to NPS, plus the bank contributes 14% separately)

Monthly expenses are roughly:

Rent: ₹10–11K

Other expenses: ₹8–9K

So I’m left with around ₹24K/month and I have no idea how to invest it properly since I am completely new to personal finance.

No loans or EMIs currently. Looking for long-term wealth creation and financial security.

What would you suggest for a beginner?

Emergency fund first?

SIPs, FD, RD, PPF?

How much should stay in savings?

Separate health insurance needed if employer already provides one?

Would appreciate a simple investment roadmap for the ₹24K surplus. Thanks!

Shifting to hoshiarpur for my job....need stay options on chandigarh road near bank lane....If anyone got any lead, DM