Anyone else only fear catching something vs. just v* once?
For example, when I was younger my fear was so bad, I feared v* in ALL aspects. I didn’t even drink alcohol because I was scared of v* and I resent my younger self for it in a way. Nowadays, I’m actually scaling back on alcohol due to drinking daily for the past two years. I also developed head splitting migraines some years back. I’ve come to peace with needing to do it most of the time. My issue now is I 100% still fear doing it in public. I held it in so many times JUST to get to the nearest bathroom stall. In spite of this, my biggest fear is catching a virus or bacteria and having to v* suddenly, and unexpectedly. I think about this weekly. it literally consumes my thoughts.
Today, I’ve been in a constant state of fear because my mom whom I live with got sick with what I’m assuming was classic norovirus on Friday night. She was in the bathroom all night. She’s not very health conscious either so I’m assuming it’s everywhere in the house now especially since we hosted an Easter lunch (which I’ve tried to talk her out of) yesterday while still not feeling too well. As well as the fact that she went in my room to look for a towel and some pills…. I ate only one bite of food yesterday because I’m just so scared. It doesn’t help that my job is very far like an hour away and I’m dreading going to work because I’m just so scared I’ll get sick there. I don’t want to eat it’s just all I’m thinking about now and any off feeling that I get makes me paranoid that I caught it