I Don’t Know Who You Are Anymore
Everything I said to you was real, and the truth about how I felt and viewed you. However, at this point, I can’t do this anymore. I feel like I’ve had to prove myself to you a thousand times, over and over again, yet was never fully chosen. I constantly wondered and asked how you felt about me. I asked both directly and indirectly, but I never got the emotional clarity I needed. At the end of the day, I guess you did choose. When I thought you died, instead of telling me you’re alive, you decided to play games and pretend to be someone else to help “ease my pain.” I went along with your game to see what you’ll do. “Will you choose me or continue to play this character?” I thought to myself. And you chose to push me away and disappear, even though it was obviously you. I gave you all of my thoughts and feelings towards you, in a clean glass. While on my end, I wasn’t sure what I was looking at. It all felt surreal. Especially now! All I wanted clear communication, but I know I won’t get that. I truly loved you, but I don’t know who you are anymore. I’m sorry. I wish things could’ve been different.