u/Visual_Shelter6922

I was not renewed for the next school year because of bad reviews from the principal. I never questioned her, I just let everything go because it was basically nothing that I could do. However, I have been told by the principal afterwards many times that I have been doing great. I have been told I have great potential. I have been told I am in my learning stages. I just don't get it. I feel like I am being gaslit or the principal is trying to gaslight me. It kind of seems like the principal tried to put me down to get me out of the position, but then try to "build me back up" in a way now that I will be leaving it. It's just weird to me.

Since I have worked as a teacher, I have gotten constant disrespect from other teachers and admin. Admin thinks that they can talk down to you or think that you are stupid. They lie to you in your face and try to gaslight you. Some teachers talk about you behind your back, but I think the worst ones that I have encountered are the teachers who try to befriend you or get their trust but then they show their disrespect to you in some way by questioning you like a child or outwardly disrespecting you to the point of bullying, talks about you to others to justify their wrongdoing, and then act nice to you and ask you what's wrong. I have tried so hard to be kind to people and forgive but I'm at a point where I'm so over people who do this. They think because I am kind and do not respond the way that they do that I'm weak, when in actually, I'm trying to be professional and do my job. I'm trying to turn the other cheek and I'm learning that people that do that test your boundaries don't have your best interest at heart. I don't understand how teachers and admin can act this way to other teachers.

I did it for my birthday weekend and felt so guilty and but I really enjoyed myself and noticed a huge difference. I also noticed I was not wanting to go back to school because of dealing with disciplining children. I feel like between grading papers and discipling children it's quite draining. Moreso telling children to be quiet and i don't have time to grade work in order to enjoy my weekend. But I felt like I chose myself and left those children where they should be and enjoyed myself. I didn't know what to do exactly but I did something. Even if it was sitting at home watching tv. I made a home cooked meal finally when during the week all I did was buy fast food. I could tell a big difference.