u/Unusual_Role_1049

Gulaab aankhen, thaka sa chehra, ajeeb haal-e-tabahi hai,

Bhuji hui shama ka dhuan hoon, aur apne markaz ko ja raha hoon.

​Heading to PIA Road for chai. Not really looking for high energy "hustle" talk tonight. Just feeling that specific exhaustion where the day is done, the energy is spent, and you’re just drifting back to your center.

​If anyone else feels like a "bhuji hui shama" tonight, come sit. We don't even have to talk.

I’ve reached a point where checking out isn't even a choice anymore. It’s just my default setting now.

​I’m 22 and I feel like a broken clock in a room full of people obsessed with the time. Everyone around me is chasing milestones. Degrees, the hustle, weddings, moving abroad. And then there’s me. Just sitting in the same gray loop, watching the years stretch out ahead of me like one long, blurred Tuesday.

​No big reveals. No main character moments. Just a constant cycle of "InshaAllah next month" and "I’ll start tomorrow" until the days just bleed into each other.

​It’s a strange kind of grief, isn't it? Mourning a life you haven’t even lived yet. Seeing a version of yourself in the mirror that you don't even recognize anymore.

​Not looking for "it gets better" or "stay positive" advice. I’m just wondering if anyone else is currently a resident of this weird, hollow headspace tonight.