How do you get over guilt?
We said goodbye to our 15 year old angel of a staffy today, she was my whole world and more. She had a really bad seizure on Wednesday and woke up completely blind, she gained some of her sight back in her right eye but was still completely blind in her left. Since then she was constantly banging her head hard into doors, corners, anything in her way really. She also was very weak on her back legs and fell over quite a few times and really struggled to walk up or down stairs without falling. She woke up during the night last night and fell off the bed then just spent at least an hour panting and walking into things whilst crying/whining. On her last day (today) she cried/whined a lot and was wandering around like she didn’t know what to do with herself, the rest of the time she was led down looking tired or sleeping. However she was still eating and drinking and wagged her tail and got up when my friend came round, she even got up and wagged her tail when the vet came to put her to sleep. I can’t stop thinking what if she would have gotten better? If it was really her time to go why would she still be accepting and eating treats? Why would she be wagging her tail? I can’t stop thinking I’ve done the wrong thing.
The vet checked her bloods on Wednesday and said they were more than perfect for a dog of her age, suggesting that it was more than likely a brain tumour that caused the seizure.