u/StandardExplorer3328

I had this overwhelming feeling of wanting to hug and cry on someone's shoulder about life and being a caregiver. I'm not sure when the last time was that I got to do that. I mean, I cry on the regular, but I try my best to do that alone - not in front of my kids, or IS, definitely not in front of family or friends. I miss being able to be embraced by my husband and cry on his shoulder. He had a brain injury from a stroke in 2008 and so when I do break down and cry in front of him it just makes him feel bad and I don't want him to feel bad. It's not his fault, but damn I'm struggling. You'd think after this many years I'd be used to it - but I don't think anyone ever gets used to caregiving. Do you ever worry your IS will outlive you? Like the stress of being a caregiver is going to shorten your own life span? For context, I'm 44F, IS is 50M and we have two kids. Been on this journey since I was in my 20's.