Struggling and in need of some comfort
Heya,
I hope it is fine to share my (slightly long) story here. I have been feeling extremely low recently because of nonstop pain and fear for the future.. And I just need some hope..
Im 33yo female, always been really energetic, love to dance, run, jump. Never had any issues except for bad vision. 6y ago I had a stress fracture on my foot from running and since then I stopped the only sport I actually liked to do, which was really hard.. Ended up only doing workouts at home, but one thing that I was proud of, was that I was really flexible and could do all sorts of splits while other people my age couldn't. It made me feel special.
A few years later i started having a weird deep pain on my left hip, which came and went. I couldn't figure out what triggered it. Massaging it usually made it worse, and it really bothered me sitting and sleeping on it. but one year later I decided I needed to see a doctor to know what it could be. The MRI results were: hips are healthy, no hip dysplasia, nothing. So I was sent home without even a PT prescription.
6 months later, I was stretching at home (doing some splits), everything felt fine but as I got up and started walking, I felt this horrible pain on my groin. It was so sharp I couldn't walk for a week. Then I went to the doctor and they saw it was a labral tear on my left hip, and suddenly I had hip dysplasia on both hips, which really confused me, since I had previously done 2 MRI at different places without any dysplasia.. And from what I have learn since then, you can't just develop dysplasia, you are born with it.. anyway
I did so much PT and it definitely improved the groin pain, but the previous hip pain I had never went away and 10months later I'm still not 100% back to normal. It was somehow fine since I felt like I still had one good hip with no issues and could still stretch it as much as I could.
3weeks ago, while doing physio at home, I got up and suddenly felt my other hip was painful.. I haven't received the MRI results yet but I am so afraid its a labral tear on my good hip. It has devastated me, since I now can't sleep, sit, or walk without pain.. It is really ongoing and I have been crying almost every day because I feel like I can't trust my body.. I never pushed through pain and now I can't walk or do anything I liked doing with my body and nothing to look forward to.. Even sex is so painful in all sorts of positions..
One specialist doctor I saw only said that the only option for me was PAO, since I am under 40yo and no sign of arthritis. However, what they failed to tell me is that I have osteomalacia (due to an eating disorder I had in my 20s), and PAO is not recommended in these cases.
I am spiralling every day, and I think I just need someone to reassure me... My boyfriend doesn't know how to support me emotionally (hes more practical than emotional, doesn't know what to say), and I feel very alone in this and am losing hope of ever being painfree again..
If you actually read this far, I appreciate you <3