u/Select-Implement-342

https://www.reddit.com/r/paraprofessional/s/28kxA6hKjx

Post is tagged incase anyone wants to reread:

SO I MET WITH MY REP. I choose to meet with the SPED director. She is new and has been known to show up for, not just parents and the kiddos, but paras as well(she use to be a para back in the day!!) she was genuinely disappointed and disgusted by the comments made and was shocked that I waited so long to address it with anyone. I did explain to her that I was having an internal conflict, as well as, being WAY too emotional to handle any kind of conversation about this.

So my update: she is addressing all of this to them tomorrow after the meeting, since she is a higher up in Admin, she has said if these things continue she WILL work on passing this up to the higher higher ups, as this situation has really taken a turn, when it could’ve all been avoided had GV not gone the route she did. She also did kind of mention putting the GV on a watch list of possible people to let go. I know this is what we all kind of wanted after reading the post, but I don’t think it’ll get that far. One can only hope.

I went into work today, and GV truly thinks she won’t get in trouble. I will do another update tomorrow after the meeting and after I hear what happened during the meeting. The update won’t be a new post, but simply in the comments here or the OG post if anyone cares or wants to know about this further! Thank you ALL for the amazing advice and support. You have no idea how much you all helped me through this and it has taken such a weight off my chest. Thank you so much again. <3

Much love, peace,and happiness ! PLUS ONLY 54 MORE DAYS AND WE ARE HOME FREE FOR THE SUMMER! (My mimosas are calling my name by the beach already haha!)

SORRY IN ADVANCE if this is unclear. I’m trying to not use TOO much detail. I can give more context. Just not in this forum. :)) so if it’s too confusing for people I will just delete it!! Thanks!

So. I am a African American Woman.

I have had this job for about 2 years and have made lots of friends and connections. It’s a great way for me to prepare for my degree(Elm ed!). I have no ties here other than my partner. So I truly do not mind leaving this environment over something like this. But am I overreacting???? Should I let this go???

The sped teacher(GV Is what I’ll call her) I’m working with…I’ve had issues with her. She is very entitled and privileged.

I try to just do what I’m told and not engage. But something happened recently that I don’t know how to feel about.

GV has a problem with people having control. She NEEDS to be the one in charge of the situation no matter who it is. I learned this early in the year, and learned then to shut up and let her rock. And when I’m back in the gen Ed room with my teacher( who I am quite literally close friends with), I can do what I do best to help the kiddos.

RECENTLY, there has been a problem with one of my kiddos, her parent, and GV.

The child clearly has ADHD(undiagnosed. This parent doesn’t want to medicate the child yet and I COMPLETELY understand. She told this to my teacher when the mom sent the message to GV I will refer to later on) . My teacher knows it, I know it, and the sped teacher know it. WE ALL KNOW WE CANNOT SAY THESE THINGS TO PARENTS OR KIDDOS LOL. So this child I struggling with Multiplication. Across the board…all of the grade is. The grade level teachers have put plans in place to help the kiddos get where they should and so much progress has been made. When GV pulls her kids out we do these little morning test on their facts for that week. My kiddo struggled bad, and it PISSES GV off. She blamed the parents, accusing them of not doing their best to sit down with the kid nightly and work.( even tho it’s our job to help get her to the point where regardless of what she may or may not have, we help her get through this small hiccup!) She would ask the kid if her parents were together, she would say to her face and other kids that she has an attention problem. She even went as far as making a parent phone call, asking the mom if she and the dad were together AND THEN saying, after mom said it was none of your concern, “well, if it were my kid, I would want them to be on medication for ADHD”. She THEN questioned her about her job and who level of education as well. (This parent and student are both black btw)

This obviously causes problems and meetings have now been made and a very nasty message was sent to GV from the parent. She is asking the kid no longer work with GV and I don’t blame her.

After I found all this out, the PRINCIPAL, my teacher(she was kind of listening in, kinda how I was), and GV were all discussing this and comments about the mom being mentally unstable, a drunk, and an aggressor were all made in front of me. (I have seen the message and from both my teacher and I’s point of view this is an ANGER mom. Who no longer trust the school because of this situation and how GV has acting to and infront of her and her child.)

These comments made me feel uneasy and uncomfortable, and they were mircoaggressions towards the mom. When I did bring this up, I was laughed at essential and told “well i mean. Don’t you understand how we think she’s a drunk? Look how she’s texts!”

I know these things are completely unprofessional but I truly felt SO uncomfortable and felt like there were micro aggressions used during this interaction. I did meet with my rep to ask what she would do, and I have a few options. But am I overreacting??? Should I drop this or should I see what my rep says on Monday????

Any advice is good advice! (Unless you’re being rude ig lol)