First character death… am I being too picky?
Hey everyone,
I’m pretty new to D&D and just had my first character death yesterday. Honestly, it hit me harder than I expected. I’d put a lot of work into this character (drawing them, writing their backstory, making sure they fit the lore, etc). I was the only melee in the party (which i did because i knew the others would be squishy) running a gish build (Warlock Great Old One 3 / Fighter 1). My party is a divination wizard and a trickery cleric.
In our last session, I opened a dungeon door and three zombies rolled super high initiative. One paralyzed me, the others took me down, and I died before anyone could react. It wasn’t even a boss fight...just a random encounter. I felt crushed because the campaign is heavily tied to our backgrounds, and my character’s hometown is central to the story.
I asked the DM if I could roll a new character who would rescue mine and then play her as a reborn, but he said that wouldn’t be fun long-term. So I started brainstorming a new character, but I’m struggling to fit into the ongoing campaign. I tried a paladin of Lathander, but the wizard uses undead spells like animate dead. I asked if the DM could reskin it (like animate armor instead of skeletons), but he said no.
On top of that, I had items (boots of elvenkind, an unknown amulet, and about 230 gp. 150 of which I spent on potions for the party). The DM said new lvl 4 characters start with base gear and one common item. I bargained and got 100 gp, but I still feel behind compared to the others (E.g. wizard, has a magical staff, a spellbook from a defeated mage, a raise dead trinket, and more gold. Meanwhile, I’d be starting with basic gear and a cloak of billowing.).
So here’s my question: am I being too picky for wanting more items or some way to keep my old character’s impact? Or am I just being a sore loser because it was my first death? How would you guys overcome this feeling? I really enjoy D&D, but right now I feel discouraged and unsure if I want to keep going with this campaign.
Thanks for reading! I’d love to hear your thoughts or advice.