How does God expect me to work?
I’m (18M) kind of worrying about how God expects me to work even though I’m being faithful—or at least I think I am.
Basically, I made this work schedule that’s solely for working towards my dreams and goals:
Work on 2-3 goals six days a week for an hour and a half to 2 hours per activity depending on the day:
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Monday
Drawing
Screenwriting
Tuesday
Film Study
Drawing
Wednesday
Screenwriting
Screenplay Study
Thursday
Drawing
Film Study
Friday
Screenwriting
Creative Output
Saturday
Sabbath rest day with no required productivity. The focus is full rest from work-related effort. You may walk, reflect, pray, or do light, non-productive inspiration only if it feels restful rather than demanding.
Sunday
Light reset day. Optional gentle creative work or catching up on one missed block if needed. Otherwise use this day to plan the upcoming week and ease back into structure without pressure.
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My deepest concern is that I’m not doing enough and that I’m still being lazy.
Laziness is one of my biggest fears in regards to being viewed by God/Jesus. Every time I think I’m being a sluggard and I’ll eventually come to poverty bc of my lack of work.
I feel like I’m disciplining myself more, but then I compare myself to others—some, if not most people work multiple hours on their goals and passions—and that makes me feel inadequate or lazy.
Another big fear is burning myself out or working too much because I know scripture warns about “anxious toiling” and working too hard/much overall and I just don’t want that.
I’m trying to be faithful with the work God has given me and ultimately faithful to Him alone, I just fear I’m doing everything wrong and I need to work even harder and more…
I would really appreciate some insight and guidance through this (even just saying that feels like idolatry). I’m just very confused and worried because I want to serve God with all my heart, but I also don’t want to exceed my limits in an unhealthy way which He warns about.
Please, I would love some advice, insight, guidance, help, etc. I don’t currently go to a church, so I have no one truly other than here to express my concerns.
I’m praying for Jesus’ guidance and wisdom through this difficult time as well, hopefully something hopeful and good comes. Please, Lord help me.