u/Objective-Vanilla747

Hello everyone,

I’ve been experiencing hypertension for the last couple of weeks, my BP being around 120/90-140/90 (the bottom number is usually higher). At my last OB appt they did a non stress test after 3 high BP readings and told me I have moderate preeclampsia and want to dilate me at 37 weeks. That was when I was 34+3. They told me to watch out for severe preeclampsia symptoms.
I am 35 weeks exactly today.

What are all of your experiences with preeclampsia? How long after diagnosis did you give birth?

Thank you all, I’m a FTM.

For context-

I went no contact with my parents from New years of this year to March due to conflict. I decided to reconnect because I’m pregnant and I guess I’m just stupid. I asked her if she wanted to be one of the hosts of my baby shower in April with my mother in law. She agreed. She then ruined the reconciliation by saying I was going to be a bad mother and not take care of my child, and I went no contact with her again until about a week before the baby shower (in hindsight, this was good, because I was able to relax at my baby shower and not be awkward. She still wanted to host so I let her). After the baby shower I was experiencing high blood pressure and she asked if she could help bring some of the gifts inside our apartment. I left the decision up to my husband because I was exhausted from the day. He agreed. They now know my address. He also asked if my mom and his mom could help us organized the apartment a bit and the nursery since he works long shifts and I can’t do much anymore. They came and did it a couple days afterwards. Looking back, I wish I knew what to do. For context as well my dad lets my mom run the show and is emotionally very checked out and is basically my mom’s flying monkey.

I was diagnosed a couple weeks ago to be at high risk for preeclampsia and I have high blood pressure from time to time that’s needs to be monitored (my mom had preeclampsia with both my brother and me, resulting in preterm labor). I give birth in June. I’m also at risk for postpartum depression. I’m a FTM.

Story: My mom leaves for a trip today overseas. Yesterday she texted me and goes “I need my green luggage you have and dad will be there at noon”( I guess you couldn’t ask our availability first??) and I said Evan will be busy with going to work and I’ll be unavailable (I’ll be honest I just wanted to eat and sleep and I was getting uncomfortable with my moms involvement. 20 texts a day type of thing). So I said the luggage will be outside our sliding glass door and they could grab it at 1:30. She was already hostile about this and said “I won’t even knock on the door.”
So at around 1 o’clock I was starving and went to our kitchen. I was making food and I had headphones on just in case she was there and would see me. My mom scanned the parking lot and looked for my car to see if I was home. I had my headphones on and I could hear tapping at our sliding glass door. She saw me. I tried to ignore her for about 15 MINUTES. I finally couldn’t ignore her anymore and pretended to just notice her. I opened up th sliding glass door and I said “what’s going on? How long have you been here for?” She goes “a while.” I said “I specifically left the luggage here so you could grab it and leave.” She says “why are you so mean? I came by to give you some night gowns for when you give birth” (not maternity by the way so they will not be used) and then she said your son will treat you the same way you treat me, mark my words.” I said “please stop.” My dad then piped in while walking away with the luggage and said “we’re not trying to bother you can’t you get that through your head?” I said “stop this right now. This is my apartment.” And I shut the sliding glass door and locked it.

I texted her and told her she wasn’t allowed to come to MY apartment and insult me or my family. And she brought up my son. Which is disgusting. She texted me and said “I dont want to come over anyway. Good luck. I will pray for the baby to be healthy and for you to have love in your heart since you only have hate. We dont want to come over. We will pray you will take proper care of your baby.” Basically insinuating I won’t be a good mother to my child. I told her from now on if she needs to contact us she can do so through my husband. Then I blocked her.

I’m stressed my very stressed. My husband was so angry about this he tried calling both my mom and my dad last night. Neither person answered. He’s texting them in the morning. It’s 5am and I’m thinking about how I can’t even look forward to my birth without my mom finding out I gave birth and making my life a living hell. My husand has 3 months off for maternity leave so if the show up unannounced he’ll be there to deal with it or call the cops. But what about when he leaves for work after the 3 months? I don’t know what to do. I’ll have my husbands family to help support and friends. But what if they show up unannounced and bang on doors and windows. Yesterday she yelled my name through the window as well.

I can barely move. I have high blood pressure and now I gotta go through THIS. I guess my question to you all is what should I do postpartum so I can keep my peace with my baby as a first time mom? I could call the cops on them but what if my parents call CPS and make a case that we’re not fit to be parents? I guess I’m just jumping to worst case scenarios but I’m losing it. I’m stressed and bay can probably feel it. Please help me out, especially fellow mamas who’ve been through this before. And please just take it easy. I’m really struggling. (If anything sounds confusing, please ask about it for context. Pregnancy brain is a real thing.)