Medical Anxiety - Need Support
This is my first post to this sub. I’m hoping to find support here for my medical anxiety. I’m a 16 year survivor of stage 4 Hodgkins. I was pregnant while diagnosed, and my 16 yo daughter is thriving, along with my 17 yo son.
I’m grateful to be here, and I know I should be taking better care of myself, but I am really bad about avoiding every type of doctor’s appointment and medical screening because I’m scared that I’ll be diagnosed with something. I feel ashamed that I haven’t taken better care of myself, and guilty too. My husband has been firmly reminding me that I need to get myself a physical. Last time I had a physical I skipped all the bloodwork, the colonoscopy, etc. the only thing I did was my mammogram. And now I’m in my late 40s. I know I need to do it, but when I think about calling and making the appointments my anxiety spikes and I just can’t do it.
It doesn’t help when my husband and other family members say, “You know, with your history you really should…” because yes. I do know. And that’s the thing that terrifies me. I’m afraid that I will have diabetes, heart disease, another type of cancer, etc. I’m afraid of all these tests, procedures, the potential cost (I’m in the US) and everything related to all of it.
Does anyone else experience this?
Can anyone please share some kind words of encouragement and support?
I have had years of therapy, but I’ve been out of it for a while. Thinking of going back temporarily just to have a supportive coach to help me through the anxiety of the physical and exams.
What has helped you?