Gardener and flower theory!
The whole “gardener and flower” theory doesn’t make sense. One person can’t be the flower while the other is the gardener. A woman should be a flower to her husband, and he should be the same to her. Both people have to participate for a relationship to work.
That was the problem in their relationship — Carolyn was the gardener while John was the flower. She took care of everything, and the relationship could only function as long as she was the one giving 100% of herself, while he wasn’t. I think his friend, in his book — I believe it was Robert — said that Carolyn was the one who pulled away from John first. But I think she simply realized that she was giving too much of herself to someone who couldn’t support her in her difficult moments, especially when it came to the paparazzi. Whenever she brought it up, he would convince her that she was overreacting. Even his friends thought she was exaggerating and made jokes at her expense.
I feel really sorry that she didn’t have emotional support from him. You can see that in the books I’ve read — she didn’t even have support from his friends, even though she was there for them when they were going through problems or difficult situations in their own lives.
Because when you really look at it, what did he actually give up? What did he change in his life to fit into hers? Nothing. Maybe I’m wrong, maybe some of you know more, but she gave far too much for him. I truly think she fell in love with him and was blind to certain things. I just hope that behind closed doors it was different, and that things weren’t exactly the way his friends say or believe.
I know a lot of people say they would have gotten divorced, but we don’t know that. I don’t think even they themselves knew where their relationship was going.
I’ve also seen many people talk about the “taxi theory,” but I don’t see it that way. I think he fell in love with her and that’s why he married her—not just because it was “time” to do so.