The last few years have been quite hard. 3 years ago I got into a fight with my friends and I didn’t have friends for six months. After that I’ve just been going from girl to girl and I don’t know why at all. I’ve had 4 girlfriends since then and plenty of talking stages but what sticks out to me the most is the fact that the deepest connection I had was with an on and off situationship for like a year. I loved to talk to her, I sometimes still do though.
The thing is I’m in a relationship now for around 6 months and I just feel so overwhelmed I can’t give her what she deserves even though she says its okay. Im just in a hard spot right now, I don’t have any energy to do anything. I feel like I always hurt her even though I try my best and shes very sensitive aswell. My friends are okay, I have trouble opening up to them or my girlfriend. My friends now are nice to me and all but not the real deep friendship or anything.
The last 4 months I’ve felt empty. I can’t experience true euphoria and everything doesn’t feel cool and new like it used to. I’m kind of in a tough spot I can’t give the person I care about what she deserves and it breaks my heart, I just feel too exhausted all the time.