u/Murky_Confection_356

I 23F and my 27M partner have been together for several years prior to this injury and all the things i’m heavily starting to resent were all issues before and only got worse after the injury. My partner was diagnosed with CRPS in his wrist and that’s left me pretty much having to do everything. He’s out of work so I’m working full time, and responsible for all of the cooking and housework which I don’t mind it just has gotten to be exhausting going on for a year now and has me so mentally drained. he will try on rare occasion to help straighten up around the house but will refuse to listen to me on small things and end up making more work for me a lot of times. He and the issues we had previously haven’t made the current circumstances any less exhausting, everything is a competition now I have no safe space to communicate my feelings or struggles throughout the day without hearing “wanna trade?” or “at least ur not injured” just making an already difficult situation even more draining. He also tends to make remarks about how he was working for longer than i have been and essentially had to “do more”. To be fair he was working 2 jobs at a point but also never had the added load of housework to worry about or being the caregiver for an injured person. Over the last few years i’ve had a lot of misfortunes around family and friends so now im kind of left with no one. So not only do I get constantly dismissed and invalidated by my partner, but I also don’t have anyone I can vent to or anyone that’s bothered checking in even knowing my current situation. We don’t get much sleep with his constant pain he’s usually tossing and turning and i’m a very light sleeper so just another added factor to the exhaustion. I feel like I’ve had to take on everything pick up all the slack and i’m getting barely any thanks or acknowledgement for it and I’m starting to seriously resent him. Financial problems haven’t helped either with him being out of work and the one vehicle we have got hit a few months back. We haven’t been on a proper date in years (he wasn’t great at planning and executing dates prior either), haven’t had anything special done for me in the same amount of time, nothing to fill my cup back up is what i’m getting at. I’m scared that this will be forever if i stay but also feel trapped, he’s always had the habit of making himself a victim in situations so now it feels almost like he has the perfect cover to never let the victim mentality go. (i know it sounds horrible and i feel horrible even thinking this) but it really does feel as if he’s gotten comfortable with the dynamic and the ways he can take advantage of it and he lacks the emotional intelligence to even have a productive conversation about any of it. I forgot to mention he’ll sit on his playstation for several hours a day making me believe he’s capable of more than he sometimes lets on but will adamantly deny it and claim he doesn’t spend as much time on it as he does, I don’t know what to do or think anymore