I got stalked by a psychopathic teenager
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Hi there. This is a throwaway account, and you'll see why I'm using one for the following post.
(Insert obligatory "I'm on mobile" sentence here)
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It was after a particularly long binge of D&D horror videos while prepping for my own campaign (forever DM here) when I had the idea to look for a local group so I can be a player for a change. Dear god, I still remember this moment like it was yesterday. TOTALLY not me thinking "they're just stories, it won't be like that in my little city". Little did I realise just how awful things could get.
So I posted on a group for my local game store, and a few days later, an admin got back to me saying "hey, we have a spot at a beginner's table in a few days time at 5pm". Even though I've had several years experience with D&D 5e, I relished the idea of having an easy ride. My life is hard enough, I want to play a fun, easy game. Mainly, I was looking forward to being out of the house for something other than groceries and uni.
Game day arrives. I left my game books at home (because I was coming straight from uni and had plenty of other books to carry) but brought several character sheets for the DM to pick from, seeing as they were well into the campaign). I assumed they would have the necessary books anyway. I introduce myself to the DM and four other players. Then I met eyes with *him*. The Problem Player™, and defs a problem *person*. Let's call him Tom. His eyes bore into my soul. Not in a negative way, but looking back, it certainly predatory.
The DM was professional, but personable. Reasonable and open to suggestions. A great storyteller. He was very lax with the rules so it was more accessible, but still maintained the core mechanics so it wasn't broken. Even when players were *really* struggling with a concept, even after quite some time playing, he was patient with them.
Tom was completely the opposite. He was playing an isekai'ed teenager from Japan that developed mad fighting skills. His character was also cynical, misogynistic, a human supremacist, and blew the other characters off constantly. Strangely enough, Tom was a nice enough guy outside of his character. We bonded over anime and video games. We exchanged discord names and vaguely planned to play BG3 co-op sometime.
I left that session feeling really good. Uni was full on and left me very little energy to do anything. I'm glad I went. I'd soon suffer the consequences of my hubris.
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I get home, put my bag down, and flop on my bed. I didn't check discord for a while, I wanted to decompress until tea time. My phone kept buzzing. Annoyed, I looked at it, and it's a bunch of texts from Tom, urging me to talk to him. We start chatting and he sees my discord profile pic. It's a rather provocative photo of me in a goth gown with slits up the legs to reveal my thighs and garters, with a full face of makeup. It's at this point that I should state that I'm an alt AFAB non-binary person. I have a mostly shaved head with a pony tail, large stretchers, multiple facial piercings, and though I don't wear makeup usually, I will occasionally put on eyeliner if I wanna feel ✨pretty✨. In other words, I'm not constantly full glam.
"Oh wow, just saw your display pic! HOTTTT". I grimace. I respond with "Aha thankyouuu" - I tried to brush it off and tried to convey my discomfort. Clearly it didn't land. He was calculated enough to keep conversation relatively normal and only occasionally slip in a sly flirt. I'm feeling internally pressured to compliment him back, so I tell him he's good looking. Dickhead. I ask him if he studies at uni or technical school. Bro's 17 and in high school. I'm 32. ⚠️DANGER! DANGER!⚠️
As soon as that realisation dropped, I told him that maybe we should just catch up at the store, because I'm not comfortable being 1-on-1 with a minor. He proceeded to be a massive sooky la la about it and said "I'm not doing anything wrong", and of course going really heavy on the fact that, because I called him good looking, I absolutely *must* be into him. Cue me sinking into the crust of the earth, waiting for it to swallow me. He said he "always wanted to f*ck a goth milf". EXCUSE ME? I don't have children, but thank you, literal minor, for reminding me that I'm in my 30s and technically old enough to be your parent. "No one will ever know, I promise". Was this kid fucking grooming me?! I tell him flat out NO and block him. I didn't tell my partner. I probs should have. Maybe it wouldn't have gone as far as it did.
Idiot me, not wanting to break up the group immediately after being recruited, went back the following week. He, of course, was there. He *glared* at me at every opportunity he could. His character consistently set traps around camp that I would nearly step in. He'd "accidentally" stab me while "targeting someone else". He'd even fucking TOUCH ME WHILE I WAS SLEEPING. DM told him to quit it after a while, but he leaned back in his chair, confident, winking at me. I raised my eyebrow at him, subtly telling him what a loser he is, and used entangle to trip him up. I was perturbed, but I wasn't about to let a minor rattle me. What's the worst he can do?
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I get a random text. Not menacing, but he wanted me to know it was him without saying it was. I felt anxious. I never gave him my number. "I got it off the DM saying I put your number in wrong lmao". Brilliant. One text became two. Then five. Then ten. I tell him again that I'm not going to prison just to fulfil his fantasy. "Stick to girls your own age". Blocked the number.
The next day, I received a text that made my blood run cold.
"Hello [real name], nice pics". The reason this messed me up: This was on an app called Fetlife (think Facebook for fetishists). No one except for very close kink friends know my real name. I make sure my Fet account is as far removed from my vanilla life as humanly possible. I don't even speak about it out loud. Looking at the profile, there were no photos, aged 99, lives in Antarctica, no posts, no interests. Completely blank. I was sure it was Tom. That means a 17 year old had access to *very* explicit material of me, paired with a vendetta.
(Before you say it, I know there's a setting to only show photos to friends. I honestly wasn't expecting anyone I knew, let alone a fucking teenager to see any of this. Don't @ me).
He kept sending taunting texts, threatening to show everyone and say I was his groomer girlfriend to get me locked up. He sent a photo. Thankfully, Fet has a spoiler filter so you have to click on it to view it, otherwise I could have potentially been done for having CP on my device. I blocked the account and reported it as an underage user - something Fet takes very, very seriously. I feel sick just bringing this up. Please don't judge me.
I called the store the next day. The DM wasn't working, but I practically begged for him to get the DM to call me. I spoke to DM. I'm nearly hyperventilating but trying to be as calm as possible so I can talk. I told them about the stalking (not the Fet stuff, I'm embarrassed enough) and that I'm out of the game. The DM was shocked and told me he won't be welcome anymore "but please consider coming back". I told him no, that I would never be able to walk down that street without thinking of a psychopathic minor that tried to groom me. Reverse uno/10. I was done. Crying, scared, cold - I've never had someone under 18 scare me like this. I felt pathetic that I let another man get under my skin like this again. I blamed, and still blame, myself. I didn't go back to the store again.
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"Hey, OP, wanna come to the Warhammer shop?", asked Mic, my partner. Yes, the same shop. I felt the blood drain from my face. I couldn't say no, he'd think something's up. Reluctantly, and with my stomach in my throat the entire time, we drove to the shop. My partner loves that shop, it's his Candy Land. He's a competitive Warhammer player and goes there frequently to add to his enormous hoard of models. I shuffle through the door, look over at the table I once sat at. No one was there, but it was still enough to trigger flashbacks of that little shit's face.
"Ah, OP, didn't think I'd see you--", I shushed the assistant I was friendly with. The same one I spoke to on the phone earlier that week. Mic was too distracted comparing shades of brown paint to notice. I filled him in on what happened, and he said DM already told him and Tom is banned from the shop. I kept looking over my shoulder to see what Mic was doing. I was getting so anxious, I decided to distract myself with the die sets and later the paints. Pants were shat as I saw Mic talking to the assistant. My hearing is impaired so I couldn't eavesdrop. My feet shuffled across the carpet as I went to join Mic's side.
"Oh, OP, you haven't told me about D&D. You were so excited". I inhaled deeply and told him quietly "I'll tell you when we get home, babe".
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AFTERMATH
Mic helped me go to the police in case Tom goes there first with his lies. I tell them everything, in tears. After we left the station, I nuked every single social media platform I had and started fresh. Told everyone I was hacked. Sent my Fet profile to the stratosphere and I'm never going back on there. I changed my number. I did everything I could think of. Nothing has happened since, except the silent dread, sleepless nights, and aversion to leaving my house.
I will never, ever, play D&D with strangers again. Hell, I'm not even sure I can talk to strangers for a while yet.
TLDR: Psychopathic minor stalks and tries to frame me for grooming
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If you made it this far, thanks for reading. It felt good to get this off my chest.
Have a pleasant day 🐀