u/MembershipMuch822

Currently, we are looking for a match for our brother and one thing has become very obvious. Online, men in their 30s are called “uncles” and “pedophiles” for even considering a younger woman with more than a 5 year age gap but in real life it gets very selective.
Suddenly the same 10–15 year age gap stops being “disgusting” when the man has money, status, passport or nationality. Then mothers of 22-year-olds approach themselves, and even the girls with that age gap are themselves interested and leave a message. So clearly the issue was never the age gap. It was convenience.
And then comes the lying. In one place, a mother told my mom that her daughter was 29 during the first talk regarding the girl's details as she messaged us after going through my brother's details. We stumbled on a post she had made a few months back saying her daughter was 32. When confronted, the response was: “maslihat k liye bolna parta hai, fitnay se bachnay k liye.”
That says everything. And cherry on top her daughter was hafiz e Quran.
My mom never cared that she was 32 as "problem". The issue was the dishonesty. If someone lies about something as basic as age, credibility is already finished.
Either age gaps are wrong, or they’re not.
But if they only become acceptable when money and nationality enter the room, then this was never about morals.
Just rishta market opportunism.