u/Material_Dragonfly18

As you’ve all read, I am a loser. I’m an 18F undergrad student who’s majoring in pre law. I don’t know where it all went wrong. I used to be a 4.0 gpa student in high school who was the president of nationals honors society and was a principal’s scholar who got accepted into an amazing college with a full ride scholarship. And now my gpa is barely hanging on and it’s at 2.0 and I’m at the risk of academic probation. I haven’t had the motivation to do anything and I’m in the second semester of my college. I failed my bio class and I’ve been missing classes and I’ve just been a hot mess these months. I just got out of a long term relationship and I’m struggling to land any internships.

I loved creative writing and drawing and I haven’t been doing either of them, I’m just rotting away while the rest of the world goes on.

I haven’t told anyone this because I am just so ashamed with myself. All my friends know me as the mom of the group, someone who helped them with their class works and exams and my family know me as the perfect daughter with straight A’s. And I don’t intend to tell them because I know they’ll be disappointed. I don’t know of if I can keep up with myself, relationships, and goals. I don’t know if I’ll ever end up becoming anything. Especially with my future career being in law, you have to be highly motivated and have your shit together to even get a chance at becoming successful in the field.

I haven’t made any friends in college, maybe one or two but that’s about it. Everyone already has their own posse and it’s very hard to make a friend in college. I wasn’t like this in high school. I don’t know where it went wrong. To make it worse I’ve been applying for part time jobs to help my family out but none of them seem to want to hire me due to my lack of experience in the working field.

I guess I’m just so fucking upset with myself because I’ve never gotten this bad grades let alone an F in a class. I am honestly so disappointed in myself and who I turned out to be.