UPDATE: reached out and got left on read lmao She’s getting married Fourth of July weekend so l went with a casual, “hey, excited for the wedding, checking in because I’m planning my pto for the summer, haven’t gotten rsvp yet” kinda thing
I have a friend getting married this July and I received a save the date back in September. She’s a close friend from college, but we’ve drifted apart in the last year — no bad blood, still chat when we see each other, just no more 1:1 conversations. I also know the groom — we’re all college friends.
I’m at dinner with this friend and other college friends over the weekend. As she’s talking about final wedding preparations, it dawns on me that I have yet to receive a formal invite. I didn’t say anything in the moment because some of the others at dinner didn’t receive a save the date to begin with, and quite frankly, I didn’t know how to approach the conversation — awkward to bring up.
The following day I text a different friend asking if she’s received a formal invite and that’s when l learn that RSVPs went out in January. There has been no change in my relationship with the bride between receiving the save the date in September to now, so I’m not entirely sure why I didn’t make the final cut.
This would’ve been my first wedding, so I’m not familiar with wedding etiquette. Curious to know, is this the norm? If a bride sends someone a save the date and decides they no longer want that guest, is it custom to ghost them and hope they figure it out? Just thought it was weird to receive a save the date then hear nothing.
I’m not going to say anything to her; it’s her wedding, I respect her decision, but wondering if any of you have a POV from the bride that you could share.
Given that we haven’t had much of a relationship in the last year, I’m not entirely surprised to have been uninvited, but if she wasn’t planning to have me at the wedding, why send a save the date in the first place?
One thing to note is that save the date and formal invite were all sent as e-vites, so not likely that it went missing, I’d think? My email hasn’t changed. Nothing in junk folders. Wedding website isn’t up to date, so I can’t enter my name into an RSVP page