How do I ask my company to switch me to a contractor and relocate abroad? It’s taking a toll on my mental health.
I’m a European expat in my late 20s, living in the Netherlands for about two years now. I work in a tech job with a permanent contract and a “fully remote” position, earning around €75–80k with the 30% ruling.
Four years ago, I visited the Netherlands and was struck by its work-life balance, seamless organisation and overall appeal as a place to live. I genuinely wanted to experience life abroad.
However, I no longer feel happy here. I feel depressed, spending weekends at home watching TV or sleeping. Social life is non-existent.
I have a few friends here, but they were already friends back home and are also expats. We’re quite far apart and their lives are busy with their own relationships and commitments, so we don’t see each other very often. With only four or five people to rely on for social interaction, I often find it difficult to connect with them.
I’ve tried meeting up and attending events related to my hobbies, but it never feels right. It’s either the language barrier or the huge cultural difference.
I also can’t enjoy my hobbies the way I did back home. They’re something that really drives and motivates me, and my social circle back home was heavily involved in them. It’s not just the hobby I’m missing, it’s the people who shared it with me.
This situation is taking a mental toll on me.
My job is remotely based, but there’s an office that’s a 130km round trip, about an hour to an hour and a half each way. Most of my team colleagues never attend it, so there’s no point in visiting.
The company is flexible and allows working from abroad temporarily, but I’m looking for a permanent solution to move back home.
From what I understand, there are only two real options:
Stay employed in the Netherlands and remain tax resident here, which defeats the purpose of moving back.
Move back home and switch to a contractor or freelancer setup, such as setting up a company and invoicing clients.
I’m struggling to find a “middle ground” where I can maintain a Dutch contract and legal address while living full-time in another country. However, I’m not sure if I’m overlooking something.
I enjoy my job and would prefer to keep it but if this isn’t possible I’d likely leave. I’d like to discuss this with management or HR but my main concerns are:
- Does requesting a contractor role and moving abroad raise red flags with HR or management?
- Could this negatively impact my position or lead to termination?
- Has anyone successfully done this with a Dutch company?
- Am I overlooking any legal requirements (e.g. remaining employed while living abroad)?
- What’s the best approach to discussing this with my employer?
I don’t want to jeopardise my situation by simply asking. I’d greatly appreciate any advice or insight you can offer.