I’m very scared of laser please tell me how it went for you
(23F) Two years ago I noticed a flat pigmented spot in my inner labia. Didn’t think much of it since I had no idea about warts or HPV.
6 months ago while shaving I felt something in my anal area that got me so confused and I kept trying to shave it because I thought it was a cotton ball from my underwear or something. ( the saxophones keeps getting louder )
Well no surprise 2 months ago I felt like I had more bumps in my anal area. I was terrified and decided to see in a mirror. I had to take breaks to not faint because I have bad health anxiety. I kept looking on google all night and quickly understood it was HPV. For three days I ghosted my bf and kept spiralling. After that I told him, and went to a doctor. She proposed laser but told me to do ther other STD’s tests first. After that I had to do a pap smear and colposcopy and I felt like I gave all i had.
All those interventions were honestly so painful mentally. even the blood tests. Like my fear of those things is really big and I just don't have the words to express it anymore since every doctor is invalidating me..
The HPV pap smear took one week, and after that the assistant called me and was very happy to tell me it came back and I had nothing.
I didn't really want to believe it, and indeed it was just the gynecologist who didn't read well the paper.
What was written is that they found high risk HPV, but not 16 & 18. Even when I confronted her she kept telling me I don't have anything and it was the HPV 6 or 11 that I had but those types weren't tested in the pap smears. Later I saw another doctor who confirmed the high risk + the low risk that cause me warts.
After that I didn’t go back to the first doctor to do laser, I was scared and didn’t understand why she didn’t propose more options.
Yesterday I saw a dermatologist specialised in STDs and she kinda got mad of me for having the reflex of closing my legs when she touched me. And she told me she don’t have laser she only does surgery and that I’m so scared that she’s sure I wouldn’t bear the pain. She told me to not let it like that since I will keep having more warts the more I let them and that I should go do laser. I hate them and I wanna remove them so bad. I’m terrified since yesterday I couldn’t even bear someone touching me there. I can’t imagine the needle, the laser, the proctologist position … ugh.