I have been diagnosed with OCD,ADHD and general anxiety/depression disorder. I decided about 3 years ago to find help and have been on a few things.
my life and feelings are : i have a job, boyfriend of several years and friends. I lay around on my phone or watch tv. if I’m home all dayand 6pm rolls around and someone wants to do something i don’t want to go, I would have needed to go do it when I started my day. I have to do ritual OCD/phrases/counting in so many parts of my day, have no desire to do anything, no motivation, have no sexual desire, I’m quickly annoyed in some situations that are so small, quick to anger which I can sometimes hide and will feel bad about ,random anxiety feelings (not really attacks just bad thoughts and tight chest or stomach) my life is not bad I don’t want to have these feelings.I want to be on a nice normal even feeling. I would like to be able to get out of bed and do chores or be in the mood to go shopping or to dinner. to live life. I realize tough times and feelings will come up no matter what ,but am just looking to feel like I’m living.
I had tried vybrid for a year, but switched to Auvelity for the ocd and depression. I was on that for about a year but two months ago switched from Auvelity to Fluvoamine 100mg to try to tackle the OCD. Then the last 3 months I am also on 5mg adderall to take in the morning ( I don’t always ) and I just switched from 30mg Vyvanse to 40mg about two weeks ago, which I also take daily ( usually)
I just don’t feel like anything is achieving a result. I went from feeling i needed help all my adult life ( but being to scared or embarrassed to do it ) to suddenly in 3 years im on a million meds but nothing is changing. the first month I think the stimulants helped with some energy and mood a little but it was absolutely nothing like what you hear. I didn’t run around happy and cleaning with so much energy . It just kinda was like .. okay let’s do the dishes and actually finish all of them. It didn’t help the thoughts constantly in my mind, I still am always talking in my head that’s just normal. it didn’t help my attention much but that was never a huge issue. I can mostly concentrate if I make the effort.
I don’t want to up any of my doses anymore. I’ve thought of just stopping everything and trying natural for a few months to clear out and start over. but it seems pointless bc what else is there to try?I feel like I have tried all categories of meds for my diagnosis.
So if anyone actually read all this lonnng post and has any ideas , or suggestions or tips i would really appreciate it . Thank you :)