My professional job is helping people with disabilities navigate healthcare systems, systems in general, promote preventative care and advocate for their needs/care gaps.
So maybe that's why I'm so effing pissed off right now. Also might be my ADHD social justice sensitivity.
Since getting serious about finding a real plan of care for my symptoms and not going into doctors/healthcare offices and BSing what I am feeling, it's been really hard to not feel crazy or less than.
Maybe it's because I can compare it to how I am treated as a professional in the field vs what it feels like to be a 30 yo female with all these symptoms I'm suddenly getting very vocal about because I can't keep it in anymore.
Today I finally got the nerve to submit a request to my primary for a work accommodation needing specific documentation on. The nurse told me to schedule an appointment. I was just there for this concern less than a month ago. Sure I didn't say, "doc I need this specific accommodation request written down" but we talked about what I need to do to alleviate my daily pain: exercise, look at my home desk area, maybe PT/OT if we can find a provider here we want to try, etc.
I'm religious and was reflecting on things that are thieves to us living an abundant life. I had several things that came to mind right away but it's hard for my internal voice to not feel like being vocal and serious about my pain isn't also a thief in its own way.
Just overall feeling like I have a limited support system and questioning how does anyone do this.