hello, we’re planning a wedding with 100+ guests in NYC next spring and are struggling to figure out how to organise the day in a way that isn’t uncomfortable or annoying for guests. We will have between 15 and 30 children, many of them babies or toddlers, at the wedding. We’ve concluded that this means we’ll have to do a rather ‘early’ wedding dinner.
We both really dislike weddings where you are stuck in one place for the whole day, we’ve been to too many where it got boring very quickly. We therefore have decided to have the ceremony and a 60-90 min long cocktail and canapés reception in one location, and then a seated dinner in another. This is where it gets complicated. We’re really unsure about what the best timeline would be.
The cocktail reception is supposed to be ‘lunch’ I suppose, but it can’t be too close to the dinner meal I feel. Or does it not matter?
Given we’ll be changing venues there will be a break between the cocktail reception and dinner, as the party will likely be moving from Manhattan to Brooklyn. Is a two hour break too long and annoying for the guests? Or will people appreciate the break and get a coffee or take their kids for a stroll in the pram or similar? I would rather not sit down for the wedding dinner before 6pm. If we do the ceremony at say 2pm, and the cocktail reception at 2.45/3, it could finish at 4.15/4.30. Maybe we then just say dinner begins at 6? Or 6.30? I think having canapés less than 90 mins before the dinner reception starts will mean nobody will be hungry for the actual dinner. Or do people not care about that and would rather the break is as short as possible and only to allow for the venue change?
The situation is further complicated by the fact that two thirds of the guests are from overseas, and could still be jet lagged. The remaining third are born and bread NYers, it’s possible that they’d prefer getting sitters for their kids instead of bringing them, but that could mean that they’d be annoyed if the day ends up too long. There are only 2 properly old people in the party, most people will be aged 32-40, and the ones without kids are pretty keen to party generally.
Sorry about the long text but finding it quite hard to accommodate all the different needs without affecting the flow we want. If it weren’t for the children I’d do the ceremony at 4pm, cocktail reception until 6, and then start the dinner reception at 7.30 but I imagine some parents with kids will want to leave by 9pm at the latest.
Advice appreciated!