I am officially a believer.
I have lived my whole life (born and raised) into the belief of Arianism, Jesus being created by God. My whole family is Jehovah’s Witnesses.
I have been doing personal study and research the last 5 months about our beliefs. Truly getting into the origin of our religion and why we believe such things. The last 5 months have been the hardest, most emotional, exhausting time ever. I feel like I hit a rock bottom…I was in an emotional state of a sinking ship in a storm.
I finally started reading the Bible for what it was, Gods word only. As JW’s, we have endless amount of literature and study aids to help us read the Bible. Our organization wants us to read the Bible through their insight/interpretation of the scriptures only.
So when I say I truly began reading the Bible, that’s what I mean. No publications, no extra literature, no study aids. I let the Bible speak to me. Draw me. And that’s exactly what it did. I learned verses that I’ve never even heard of! Scriptures that finally stood out to me and made actual sense. I was literally bamboozled every single day I opened my Bible. For 5 months, this is what I focused on, just reading and studying the scriptures only.
And just last night, I finally surrendered myself to God. I studied over this verse, “because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”
Romans 10:9
And it clicked in my head. I had started to believe that Jesus was more than what I’ve been taught. He’s not a created being. I proved it to myself with the dozens & dozens of scriptures that make Jesus Christ our God. But I had never verbally spoken it out yet.
So last night I said a prayer verbally speaking those words out into the universe “yes I believe God, that Jesus is Lord, He is your equal, He is part of you. The moment I spoke those words I was suffocated with such intense emotions that I immediately began sobbing…it was as if I finally was being welcomed and hugged by God. I felt love, acceptance, and belonging all in one feeling. don’t know how to even express what I felt. I just know in my heart that I’ve found the true meaning of what a Christian is. God has been working with me these last 5 months and now I’ve had a true breakthrough, all thanks to Him.
Is there a name for this? What do you call this experience?
Just thought I’d share this, for anyone raised how I was or is currently a JW on the fence. Please let this be a motivation for you, to start reading the Bible alone. Without the organizations aid and interpretations. I pray you find the real truth of what the Bible teaches. ❤️