u/JvRoxy

It’s been 3 months today since I had to let my soul dog go peacefully, just a day after her 10th birthday. Even until the very last moment, I kept having second thoughts because I didn’t want to let her go. A part of me was still hoping for more time.

I tried so hard to save her, to prolong her life for as long as I could. The first time she got sick, I prayed endlessly for her to recover. But all the hope I was holding onto came crashing down when the vet told me her illness was incurable and that her remaining time could be months, weeks, or even just days.

Still, I fought for her. I followed every instruction the vet gave. I prepared blended meals for her, hoping somehow I could extend the little borrowed time we had left together.

But sadly, her body slowly gave up. She let me know it was time. She became so thin and fragile. She barely ate on her own anymore. She developed nasal discharge that irritated her constantly, especially at night, making it hard for her to sleep. I would wake up over and over just to help comfort her because I couldn’t bear seeing her suffer.

And even now, I still ask why.

Why wasn’t I given the chance to grow old with her? Why was her life cut short when I truly believed she would stay with me until at least 16? I feel robbed of those years we were supposed to have together. It feels so unfair that she’s gone.

I miss our everyday routine. Life without her has been so sad. I cry for her every single day. Not a day passes that I don’t think about her and the beautiful life we shared. If I could go back and rewrite her fate, I would do it in a heartbeat.

I just want her back.