Lost in life
I am a 27 Year old Male in US, I am originally from India. Came to US to do a master's 4 years ago, I finished my masters, But didn't feel like I learnt anything. I wasn't confident to hit the job market and I also had a clinging thought of doing a PhD thinking that it would sort my immigration status. Hence I joined. When I initially joined the PhD I had no idea what research is or how to do it. After the end of 2nd year I have some idea of what research is, But I feel like my ideas aren't great. My peers are highly successful, I feel so infiror. The thing is I know a little bit of everything related to software, for example I know programming but if you tell me build a full fledged website, I won't be able to (without the help of AI).
Physically I am at 35% Body Fat, a skinny fat guy, Low on energy my, My eating habits are fucked (I mostly eat outside and twice a day) My sleep is decent but gets horrible couple of days a week. I tried to build a gym habit, for longest amount of time, I haven't able to go past first week consistently.
Relationship, I haven't had any meaningful relationship in last 10 years, Some sex here and there in these 10 years. I am emotionally numb in a relationship. While my emotions flying in all places internally (I am totally anxious and depressed).
I never learnt how to work 9 to 5, I stress work. Sometimes I work whole say, Some other days, I don't get out of my bed (all within a week). I have a huge procrastination issue, I put things to the last moment, Since joining PhD I haven't been able to pull things off in the last moment, I have constantly missed deadlines.
I don't know what I am doing anymore, I have to finish this PhD somehow (I have always ran from responsibility), need to stick to something in life, Hoping that it would pay off.
Any advice on how to fix my life or where to start? Much appreciated. Thanks