Where to start
My baby is almost 6 months, we currently have not sleep trained and do all contact naps and co sleep at night. Around 3 months he started going down in the bassinet at night for ~5 hour stretches and would take 1 hour naps in pack n’ play but that stopped after about a month in. Current rough schedule 2/3/2
Baby is exclusively breastfed and will only fall asleep at night if nursed and close to me the entire night. He will sleep through the night (11-12 hours) and we both honestly get good sleep (I usually have to wake him up at least once to change his diaper so he doesn’t leak and he usually poops once throughout the night). During the day he will fall asleep nursing, or in the carrier and sometimes in car rides. He can never be transferred or else he immediately wakes up crying - we have tried so many different ways to transfer him.
My husband and I love co sleeping and having him in bed with us but we have hit a point where I think the quality of naps aren’t always great (he’ll wake up if I accidentally move or make a noise) and I also would love a little bit of time back for self care and doing things around the house etc. he sleeps around 7:30/8 which means that is also now my bedtime.
Bedtime routine currently consists of bathing on some nights, change, red light, sound machine, nurse to sleep. He will fall asleep within 30 minutes, usually less.
I had a call with a sleep consultant who basically told me the best option was to transition to crib fully and when he cries sit next to him and put my hand on him to let him know I’m here. Frankly, I don’t think that approach would work for me or my baby. It physically pains me to hear him cry (the type of crying where he is clearly in distress/ screaming). It’s a hug adjustment for us to go from constantly holding him for every nap and co sleeping and nursing to stopping all of that cold turkey.
I’m wondering if there is a gentler and more gradual approach we could take to make the transition easier for everyone? Maybe start with naps or a strategy where I can pick him up or feed when he’s upset at night. We’ve been doing this for nearly 6 months so I’m not necessarily looking for the quickest solution and am okay taking baby steps to get there for all our sake as I know it will be a huge and emotional adjustment for all of us.
I’m curious if anyone has been in a similar situation and what might have worked for you and your family?