What I actually want to know: are there people in their 30s, 40s, beyond who’ve found a genuinely balanced way of living? Not “I take two holidays a year” and not “I’m a full-time nomad.” Something in between. I saw someone describe working three years, travelling one, is that real? Do people actually structure life like that and sustain it?
I feel like I don’t know anyone who lives the way I think I want to, and that makes it really hard to figure out if it’s even possible or if I’m just romanticising it.
Photo: from a trip 7 years ago ish
Context on me:
I’m not someone who’s been constantly on the move, I have a career I’ve built (senior product designer) though no romantic relationships? And 99% of my travel has been, I’ve lived in Melbourne properly, and my time away has come in distinct chapters: a student exchange, living and working in London, and most recently an 18-month career break doing seasonal jobs.. Six months ago I came back from my career break and I and I’m genuinely struggling to reintegrate into regular life the way I have been able to before.
The thing that’s messing with me most is this false binary I keep bumping into, either you settle, or you’re that person who always travels. And from the people around me, there’s this quiet implication that if you keep leaving, you’re running away.
Honestly it’s a Partial yes. There are things in my life that are easier to sidestep when you’re physically somewhere else. Bonus question: am I running away???
But then I get the defensive when people say that. The framing implies that being home is the default? the thing you’re supposed to be aiming for, and that travel is either a phase or an escape.
When I’m living openly in the world and traveling (basically all solo) wandering, talking to strangers, people watching, it doesn’t feel like me avoiding something, almost like learning all the time?
. And I’m increasingly aware of the practical reality (the market, financial security, do I want kids) I don’t want to be running away. I also don’t want to spend 49 weeks a year just grinding so I can have four weeks off.