u/Individual_Living876

Hello all you Extraordinary, Long Hauling Legends.

Last week I shared a milestone with you.  

It was my Two-Thousandth day as a Long Hauler.

Meaning, it was one thousand days ago that I wrote my first ‘Love Letter’ to the Long Haul community as a way to commemorate those first thousand days. 

That original post was an important moment in my recovery, as that was when I made the choice to continue writing all these silly, optimistic stories about my ongoing love affair with long hauling. 

In the thousand days from then until now, I have told you about my challenges, my victories, my doctors, my therapists, my other therapists,  my other, other therapists… 

(So many different kinds of ‘Therapy’!!)

This week on COVID is Stoopid, I am setting some time aside to consider questions I can’t answer, topics I haven’t processed and ideas with which I yet wrestle. 

I don’t have the energy to be who I was Yesterday.

So, where does that leave me Today?

And what does it mean for Tomorrow?

Spoiler alert- I have no fucking idea.

And that’s OK.

These aren't “things I’m failing at,” or “questions with no answers” so much as they are the “very important, deeply personal research questions in my ongoing experiment called Mateo’s Search for Meaning.”

But even if they weren’t… 

That would be OK too. 

If you have the spoons to listen, I hope you enjoy.

I love you all

I see you all 

I would hug you all if I could

Strength and Health,

COVID is Stoopid

.

Early on, a fellow Long Hauler told me that Long Hauling felt like Han Solo trapped in Carbonite.

And he wasn’t wrong.

But sometimes, it also feels like Cinnamon Buns tied to our ears.

Or the light of the saber hurts our eyes.

Or… Boba Fett.

But however you feel. Wherever you are.

Know that “Luminous Beings Are We. Not this crude matter.”

And we are all connected… In the Force.

I love you all

I see you all

I would hug you all if I could

Strength and Health

COVID is Stoopid

Hello to all you Amazing Long Hauling Warriors!

(Super Hella, Wicked, Amazing Warriors, I mean.)

It lifts my spirits every time I see Long Haulers accomplishing incredible things in spite of the many challenges they face. 

We face. 

Every. Day. 

Even on the days when it really, really sucks. 

Even on those days we’re still dong the things we have to do Today, to give ourselves a stronger, faster, smarter Tomorrow. 

Which brings me back to the Accomplishments of the Aforementioned Amazing Long Hauling Warriors. 

One in particular brings me here today.

It comes to us from our friend Scott. 

You might remember him as u/LionheartSH

I first made his acquaintance here on Reddit.
At that time, he had been Long Hauling for a little over six months, and was organizing an effort to promote the GoFundMes of other Long Haulers in need. 

Even then, when so much had been taken from him, he was finding reasons to be grateful and ways to be helpful. 

(I like that in a Long Hauler.)

And he continues to this day. 

He, and a group of very talented, very wonderful people, have created a brilliant fifteen minute film called “Storm”

I watched it. 
It is a kick in the feels. 

In the good way. The way that matters. 

Not only because of the stories we hear about his Life that Was, but also because of the Amazing Tale of his Life that Still Is!

I consider it an honor to be on this ridiculous MarioKart Ride Back to Health with extraordinary humans like Scott. 

Or Sophia. Or Mindy. Or Yvonne. Or EJ.  Or Melody. Or KD. Or Grace. Or Gavin. Or Jon. Or Lisa. Or Paddy. Or Rebecca. Or Other Rebecca. Or So Many Others. 

Or YOU!!

So many of You have refused to give up.

So many of You demonstrate every day what it means to Live While Sick. 

So many of You inspire Me to continue trying to tell the whole world that We Are Still Here. 

Still navigating our own invisible Storms.

If you have the spoons to watch the film, I hope you enjoy. 

Strength and Health,
COVID is Stoopid

Hello all you Incredible Long Hauling Legends.

This week on COVID is Stoopid, we return to my personal journals. 

April 2021.   Five years (Or is it Seven Lifetimes?) ago.

A month of Tests. A month of Scans. A month of HUNTING and SEARCHING for anything that might explain the worsening symptoms.  

A month that found me in the hospital for a few days, hanging with the Ologists, doing more Hunting and Searching, and ordering breakfast for dinner every night. 

A month that announced my condition via an Interview Wifey and I did with Iowa Public Radio. 

A month that asked me to consider questions like , “What does accepting offers of help mean to me?” “What does my life look like after therapy?” and “What does ‘slipping mentally’ look like?”

While I’m not sure if I found answers to these questions, I really did get to order Breakfast for Dinner every night in the hospital… So it’s not all bad.

I love you all

I see you all

I would hug you all if I could

Strength and Health

COVID is Stoopid