This is goodbye, but Is it? Some part of me feels like this couldn't be the end, and why is that? We barely know each other, and yet I feel like I've known you forever. Like everything we haven't said is already known. And there's a lot we haven't said. This invisible wall of respect, both treading the line to protect each other from the inevitable ending in an impossible circumstance.
I have a hard time rationalizing how a what if has impacted me more spiritually, mentally and even physically, despite the distance, than my last 2 tangible relationships. I've tried to dismiss this as only limerence, a new word to me. Maybe, partly yes, but I've traveled the world, I've dated and been in enough relationships, I've met and worked with thousands of people from all walks of life, so I believe I'm qualified to say...this was different. The energy that we shared was different. We both knew that we connected on every level we both needed. And that's the part that scares me the most. That one day I'll look back on this and regret having to look back on it and feel like I'm settling for anything else. God I hope I'm wrong.
I wish I could tell you that you're easy to forget. I wish I could tell you I don't think about you when I wake up and go to sleep.. I wish I could tell you I don't feel connected to you in some inexplicable way. I wish I could tell you a lot of things that would make this easier for both of us. But I can only summarize this as two beautiful souls meeting at the wrong time.
I know we don't fit into each other's lives and it would be selfish of us to not allow each other to find love in a way that's practical. I've come to accept that. And with that, I'm at least thankful for experiencing that there is still more to discover than I thought. I will always have an unconditional love for you.
Goodbye beautiful. ❤️