I was in a 5 year relationship with my first love and he betrayed and left me shortly after my birthday. He promised me over and over that he would marry me and never abandon me, even swearing in the name of Jesus, yet he broke those promises many times. I truly believed he was “the one” for me. I chose only one man to love for my entire life but now I feel like that dream and trust were taken away from me. I suspect he has a new interest and it feels like he threw me away after everything I gave him my money, genuine love, my time, a place to stay, my parents’ blessing and even my virginity, which he forcefully took from me. Even though he mistreated me, talked down to me, lied, gave me silent treatment and did things that felt like microcheating, I still stayed loyal and forgave him again and again. He barely had money at times and I still spent my own money to help and support him because I truly loved him.
I am grieving deeply. I am in so much pain and I feel broken and su1c1d@l because of everything that happened.