I feel like I’ve slowly disappeared from my own life.
I’m 27 and lately I feel like I’ve reached the lowest point of my self-esteem and sense of self.
I work remotely in a role that’s somewhere between a job and freelancing, so I spend almost all of my time at home. In the evenings I try to step outside maybe a walk in the park or a short drive nearby just to clear my head, but most of the time it’s just me by myself.
I don’t really have friends nearby. In general, I’ve never had a big social circle either. Maybe 1–2 friends depending on how much we stay in touch, but they all live far away now.
What hurts the most is feeling like I’ve lost basic human connection. Sometimes I genuinely feel like I’ve forgotten how to communicate, how to share things, or even how to naturally be part of conversations anymore.
And when I see people hanging out in groups, couples enjoying time together, or friends just casually existing around each other, it makes me feel physically uneasy sometimes. Not because I hate them or want what they have exactly but because I start questioning myself.
I’ve become fearful of approaching people or even talking confidently. I know people usually say “just go out more,” but how much can someone really go out when they’re always alone?
I feel emotionally exhausted and out of ways to cope. It’s started affecting my focus, my work, even my appetite. I don’t even recognize myself lately.
(Used GPT to help structure and frame my thoughts better.)