Basically what the title says. My parents were together for just shy of 40yrs before dad died. After 3-5yrs we looked into getting mom on some dating websites. It worked for a cousin if hers so whats the harm.
After that it was her acting like a teenager with crushes. All over the phone. Well After 1 guy sounded like a fucking hallmark movie I did some digging and found out he was SUPER fake. He even used the Palisades fire for sympathy. When I went to mom with proof she didnt believe any of it. Then to find out she was talking to 2-3 other guys at the same time. It finally came to a head when we found out she was texting them her address and pictures of her with my kids! As someone who grew up in the generation who first had the internet and for her to beat into my head as a kid to never trust strangers that really pissed me off.
We decided after that to cut her off from our kids until she deleted the apps, deleted their numbers, and went to a support group or therapy. It took her a bit but she did the first 2 and went to 1 session each of the therapy/support group. Everything was fine. Then about a month ago we found out from a source we trust that she was talking to atleast one of the guys again. A motherfucker named "William". Not only that but she had recently went out of state and told us it was only for helping house sit a friends house. Come to find out it was to meet up with William. Funny enough he never showed up. Shes denied all of this again.
It took us until yesterday to finally bring the hammer down on her again. We'd have done it sooner but a long running family emergency made it impossible to deal with that and her at the same time. We told her shes fully cut off from our kids until she admits to talking to him and agrees to our plans to get her help in understanding these fucking scammers arent real.
I just need some advice for therapy or support groups or plans of action if anyone has any. Its absolutely killing me to see the strongest woman Ive ever known acting like a lunatic. Shes the only grandparent my kids have but I have to protect them above all else. I need help and im turning to the internet which could make it worse but im backed into a corner. Any helpful advice is appreciated.
In closing if you dont have advice but have an older divorced/widowed parent or relative please dont make our same mistakes. It would have been better to never get her on those apps to begin with.