u/Hope-is-lost1988

Hej!!

I work for one of the big companies in Gothenburg and I’m a non-Swedish person with my skin color - which never mattered to me - brown ( you will get to know why I’m mentioning this). Please don’t ask me which country I’m from because it should not really matter.

At my work I recently got included in meeting involving other groups, this meeting is a decision making meeting and I was included to be part of meetings representing my team along with Management. My team has seniors who are more experienced than me. When they came to know I’m involved I could see they did not feel good about it and even for me it was news and I was digesting why I was considered for it.

But what punched me in my face was the comment I received “You are being involved because of your “brown skin” and this was delivered as a joke. But it was as micro aggression, I’m not able to find a right word, but I feel there was so much hidden hate due to my skin colour. I respect this person as he was very influential in shaping my thinking technically but this was not first time I got such comment but first on skin colour but off late I was getting subtle remarks that was towards my ethnicity and culture and relating that to my deliveries. I’m expected to say yes and be submissive and since I started saying no and having my opinion there has been isolation and withholding of information.

I got to know later why I was involved which was a valid reason. But I’m unable to get out my head this comment and it shows the person is not the same who acts like they pretend to be.I realised deep down this person looks down on people who are not Swedish and has hate.I felt bad that there were other Swedish people in the room and they laughed and I’m the only non Swedish person in the team. I didn’t react at that moment as I didn’t want to escalate the situation due to my anger. But I feel bad for not responding.Even though other work was being given to me, I was being forced to do only what this person wants.

I don’t want to escalate to my manager because I feel it will be serious implication for that person and I don’t want to cause any harm. I also see as a consequence certain information is with held from me and I’m not allowed to talk to higher up people when they reach out to me.There were times when I was just shouted at to just do what is said without asking questions.

I know not all Swedish people are like and I really respect Sweden and I’m not taking anything for granted. All I want is level playing field , I know world is unfair and I’m trying to step up and speak for myself but this comment is bothering me a lot.

Surprisingly there are all Swedish people surrounding in the team (it’s an open office set up) and they say nothing. No one bothers to even ask me how I felt and why this person is shouting at you.

My humble request is please speak up when you see abuse at workplace, it can be Swedish or non-Swedish person.

As a non Swedish person, where can I find information about political landscape of Sweden, which parties are dominant and what are their ideologies.As I understand there is an upcoming election, just want to get an idea of what’s going on.

Also, what really Swedish people are looking for from the government and what are core issues?

Hi, 37M here. I live and work in Gothenburg and I’m single. I’m alone almost all times (I’m content being alone 🙂) and I want to eat food at good restaurants, however I feel very awkward to as I don’t know how people see a non-Swedish/non European person alone eating in a restaurant, also I don’t look polished, it’s not that I’m not wearing decent clothes but I don’t have a style and look out of place. Also I’m socially awkward and not confident in talking, I also have to tell same thing twice for people to understand what I’m saying.

However foodie in me wants to explore and enjoy the food. Can anyone suggest me restaurants where I go and eat alone without feeling awkward. I know Swedish people don’t judge but I feel if I ask one table they may feel bad that they have to give me table which would accommodate two people. Also, in a restaurant full of couples and family I feel people may feel who is this creepy person eating alone.